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Posted 22 May 2022 - 01:17 PM
i hate hate hate it
i just found out one of my friends weights 47 kg\105 lbs.... which is my gw... and she doesn't look thin???? i was so shocked i always thought we were the same weight but she's literally underweight and i'm not????
i hate myself for judging her body i have no right to do that and it's gross!!!! and after all she does look great, a lot better than me
but like... it feels like there is no hope. like even if i lose 10 kg i will still not look skinny. i will not be perceived skinny. i will be just normal. like a bare minimum. the stress i'm going through daily is not worth just being labelled "ok" in the end. but i don't want to actually get dangerously thin, like i know my health is already fucked up, i won't be able to do that. ugh it just made me so upset. i hope she's just lying about her weight.
#114 
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#115
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Posted 22 May 2022 - 10:32 PM
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#116
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Posted 22 May 2022 - 11:13 PM
xxl, on 22 May 2022 - 10:32 PM, said:
Ok I have to ask, is this about me? I mean highly doubt bc I have no friends but also very paranoid since I followed your accountability today bc were the same age and you mentioned my exact weight.
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Noo it’s about my irl friend, please don’t worry! I haven’t read you accountability, and I don’t think I’ve seen any of your pics on other forums. I’ve seen a lot of your post but I only remembered that we’re around the same height
And I’m so sorry bc now I realise how actually mean my post is. I was just so frustrated. I know most of the people are gonna look good and thin and underweight when they’re, well, underweight or at low healthy weight. I chose that gw for a reason. Like celebs (like Ariana and Emma R I posted earlier), like some girls on mpa. Even people at all of those bmi visualiser websites. They look so good and make my disordered heart jealous.
Just that exact person triggered the hell out of me. Again, sorry
#117
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Posted Yesterday, 12:19 PM
lazurebird, on 22 May 2022 - 11:13 PM, said:
It’s okay no need to apologize. I did assume it was irl person but I could be an irl person you know so I asked. But I totally know how triggering irl ppl can be.Noo it’s about my irl friend, please don’t worry! I haven’t read you accountability, and I don’t think I’ve seen any of your pics on other forums. I’ve seen a lot of your post but I only remembered that we’re around the same height
And I’m so sorry bc now I realise how actually mean my post is. I was just so frustrated. I know most of the people are gonna look good and thin and underweight when they’re, well, underweight or at low healthy weight. I chose that gw for a reason. Like celebs (like Ariana and Emma R I posted earlier), like some girls on mpa. Even people at all of those bmi visualiser websites. They look so good and make my disordered heart jealous.
Just that exact person triggered the hell out of me. Again, sorry
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#118
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Posted Yesterday, 12:45 PM
xxl, on 23 May 2022 - 12:19 PM, said:
It’s okay no need to apologize. I did assume it was irl person but I could be an irl person you know so I asked. But I totally know how triggering irl ppl can be.
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thank u for understanding! and I don’t think it’s you, unless you’re a redhead girl from russia named Julia, then it would be a crazy coincidence.
#119
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Posted Yesterday, 10:46 PM
lazurebird, on 23 May 2022 - 12:45 PM, said:
nope lolthank u for understanding! and I don’t think it’s you, unless you’re a redhead girl from russia named Julia, then it would be a crazy coincidence.
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