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Posted Yesterday, 10:18 PM
Calories total today: 785
-Morning: Nothing
-Afternoon: Apple (100 cals) + Coffee (0 cals) + Vanilla Nutpods Creamer (20 cals) + Lakanto sweetener (0 cals) + Lemon Cake Quest protein bar (170 cals)
-Evening: Seafood Udon noodle bowl (290 cals) + 2 soft boiled eggs (140 cals) + Green onions (5 cals) + Baby shrimp (60 cals) + Mountain Dew Spark Zero Sugar (0 cals)
Exercise: A short walk
I’ve been on this new migraine medication for a couple weeks now and honestly it’s been working unbelievably well. I haven’t had to take any Maxalt, there was one day last week I woke up with a slight headache, but it was my day to take the new drug (It’s only taken every other day preventatively) so I took it, went back to sleep and was pain free by the time I woke up. My head started to hurt about an hour ago though, I took some Advil in case it was just a tension headache, but it hasn’t helped yet. If it doesn’t improve I’ll take a Maxalt, I guess. One migraine in two weeks is a HUGE improvement from the 2-4+ per week I got before, though, so I’m not complaining. I really hope I can continue to get it without having to pay the equivalent of 2/3 of my rent every month.
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Posted 05 May 2022 - 01:16 PM
I've just been so miserable and exhausted I haven't felt up to writing or posting pics, I haven't even done any work for uni. It's just a complete freeze to just stop and breathe and get a grip while I pretend my life isn't crumbling around me, because there's no freaking pause button.
Since my last proper post it's been binge, purge, lax, overexercise, panic, repeat and fam, I am tired. Sort of got things slightly under control again, then had a horrible fight with my SO in the car which verged on a breakup. On a drive to an event with her family too, where we acted out like everything was fine, and I wore her sunglasses because my eyes were horrifically bloodshot from crying. It's resolved now, as much as anything with her is ever resolved, but it triggered me real hard and hey! Suddenly no more binge urges at all, when it's been incessant lately. At least that's something. To be honest I was almost relieved when it seemed like that was going to be the end of my relationship. The passive aggression is getting crazy and I feel like I live with a particularly volatile stranger. But no, no breakup after all.
Now I'm just tired again.
It feels sometimes like she's settled on one sole way of seeing and understanding me and there's nothing I can do to make her really listen and really see me and really 'get' anything I mean if it doesn't match her image of me. So everything I say is automatically wrong, and me being upset is a personal attack. My options seem to be to never express anything, or just accept that every time I try to speak up I'll spent the next few days dealing with the fallout. I'm soul levels of tired and I've had adrenaline for days.
Oh, and I didn't sleep for 38 hours for a period this week, so my insomnia is going great.
On a good note, I'm braving going back to ballet not at my lowest weight! New studio so hopefully no familiar faces, but still. I'm hoping throwing myself back into dance will give me something to focus on that isn't just how awful my home life is getting. First class I'm enrolled in is next Sunday. Mother's Day. I was just gonna do ballet at home on my barre but it sounds like such a nice way to get out for a while. I'll have to get some new shoes and tights this week. Maybe dancing again will make me physically tired enough to sleep.
Trying to focus on all of that right now because additionally, between relationship dramas and work and my ED and general misery, my doctor is getting vaguely desperate to know my weight. She actually dragged a scale right over to me, right in front of my chair, and then spent ten minutes trying to convince me to just step on it. We made a compromise in that I'll do her pile of blood tests and maybe try booking a new psych, and she gives up on her scale dream for two full weeks before she's allowed to ask again.
So yeah a lot happening all at once, and none of it remotely comfortable.
I'll be updating as normal from tonight though so it'll be nice to have a bit of a routine again xxx thanks for sticking around while I went all chaos incarnate. ♡
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#146 
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Posted 05 May 2022 - 06:09 PM
</3...i hope you're sleeping better now 
sorry to hear about the fights with your SO. feeling like you live with a volatile stranger is not what relationships should be about.
ballet sounds great! i'm glad you've signed yourself up. i wish i stuck with ballet when i started it in elementary school, i remember it being a lot of fun. looking forward to hearing about your ballet sessions at the new studio!
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#147
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Posted 06 May 2022 - 07:13 AM
Weight: n/a
Steps: 8,241
Intake: 743
TDEE: 1704
Net: -933
Days without b/p: 3
(TDEE as per Samsung watch)
Stats as at 20-Apr 2022
Height: 5'10
Weight: 122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Goal: 115.0 lbs / 52.15 kg / BMI 16.50
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Another day down. ♡
My weight is... a mystery, but I'm just starting to get a grip and done want to risk another meltdown. Plus, it's done. That whole... Thing is done. So trying to not care too much and just focus on fixing things and getting back into my routine. No matter what my weight is, it will go down again. It'll happen, if I just keep my head on straight. I'll check it when I'm feeling emotionally safer.
Tomorrow is going to be a nice, controlled day of clean eating, walking, studying and a brief interlude to go get some new ballet gear, and waste some time out of the house so I get some breathing space. Fruit and veg only tomorrow, I think. No dairy, no fish, no processed foods; mother's Day lunch on Sunday will be a complete mystery and I want at least one day of food I can feel really good about.
Today's food through the day was a black coffee, a crankt protein drink, a quest caramel chunk bar, and a Musashi energy drink. Also a fibre one caramel square. Dinner was cauliflower and broccoli rice with a little parmesan cheese, along with smoked sprats in chilli - not an exciting snap because I'm super wiped xx.
I'm so keen for tomorrow and for nice food to take snaps of. I'm so excited to have some time to myself even if it's just parked at the shops somewhere, and to get back into ballet again, properly. I feel like it's the best thing I could have decided to do for myself right now. Not a feeling I'm going to argue with.
Thanks for the thoughts and well wishes. Xxx it's been really difficult lately so I'm sorry for not replying much or getting to other accountabilities, but I'm starting to feel a tad more like me, so should be more present again. I'll get to some accountabilities tomorrow from the dance store carpark!
I genuinely hope anyone reading this is feeling as okay as possible, and I hope you have a good night.
Look after yourself ♥️
PS: here's a bonus snap of my new tattoo!
♡♡♡
Stats as at 20 April 2022
122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Height: 5'10
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
The primal questions of a marriage:
What are you thinking?
How are you feeling?
What have we done to each other?
What will we do?
#148
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Posted 07 May 2022 - 01:46 PM
Weight: n/a
Steps: 1466
Intake: 632
TDEE: 1497
Net: -865
Days without b/p: 4
(TDEE as per Samsung watch)
Stats as at 20-Apr 2022
Height: 5'10
Weight: 122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Goal: 115.0 lbs / 52.15 kg / BMI 16.50
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Hi everyone! Ballet tomorrow, so I went and got some new shoes and tights today - I'm really honestly more excited than I've been for anything for a long time. It'll be really nice to be dancing again. I'm starting to slowly feel more normal again, which is a huge relief. I have a fridge full of vegetables, a fully stocked freezer, and nothing around that I'd want to binge on. I can keep this up.
I'm having a 'no processed foods' reset day today, so chopped fruits for breakfast and lunch! Breakfast was half a red angel pear, half a Corella pear, half of a black plum and half a red plum. Also some banana. 212 calories.
Lunch was the other half of everything only no banana. The red angel pear is obscenely delicious. 154 calories.
Roast veg for dinner! Nice and warm - it's so cold inside my house my breath is condensing so this was amazing. 266 calories.
Calories total for the day was 632.
I hope you're all well ♡
#149
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Posted 07 May 2022 - 02:01 PM
So nice to so you back dear <3 . I'm so sorry to hear about all of your struggles, sending you all the virtual good vibes and hugs I can ~ .
And I'm so excited to hear about you picking up ballet again! I've always been super amazed and mesmerized by people who can dance haha, I highkey wish I could dance myself but I am way too shy :'')) (same with singing tbh). I love watching people dance ballet haha, I hope you'll have a great time at your new classes, I'm sure you'll do great once you get into it again! I know that when I don't draw or paint for a while the first time can feel a bit awkward since you're trying to reawaken muscle memory again, but after the initial hurdle it usually goes away and then I feel like the break actually made me improve oddly enough haha. So I hope you'll experience something similar, sometimes breaks from the things we love are good for progress as well ~ .
And omg your fruit looks absolutely divine! Makes me want to eat more fruits but I suck at finishing them before they go bad :''). Also I've never heard of a red angel pear before??? I'd love to try it but I doubt Sweden has the same diverse options in fruits as Australia haha''.
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✦✦✦✦✦✦
✦ Human trash & art hoe ✦
✦ Height: 5'2 / 158 cm ✦
✦ Accountability ✦
✦ INFJ ✦
✦ Sun virgo ✦ Moon capricorn ✦ Ascendant Leo ✦
✦ CW: 112.6 lbs / 51.1 kg / BMI 20.5 ✦
✦ HW: 130 lbs / 59 kg / BMI 23.6 ✦
✦ LW: 97 lbs / 44.2 kg / BMI 17.7 ✦
GW: As low as possible
✦✦✦✦✦✦
#150
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Posted 07 May 2022 - 04:19 PM
_Jem_, on 07 May 2022 - 2:01 PM, said:
Hello! Thank you friend, your support and thoughts have honestly meant everything through this mess! ♥ Ooh I hope it all just clicks right back in to being how it used to once I'm there; I'm very nervous! But I'm sure you're right and it'll be fine once I get started. The waiting is the worst part.Spoiler
It's odd because there's normally not much variety around where I live unless you go to the farmers markets, but we've had all sorts of supply issues lately (flooding and covid) and suddenly the grocery stores have endlessly different types of near everything, and I'm wondering if they haven't very casually started buying direct from farmers too haha. Either way, the red angel pear was so delicious. Just magical! I'm usually worried about wasting produce too but it's been good to have around to make me eat it instead of something else I'll regret lmao. Anti-binge hack from yours truly. I hope you're well lovely Jem, I'll pop over into your accountability today after the mother's Day insanity ♡♡♡
#151
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Posted 12 May 2022 - 03:34 PM
Stats as at 20-Apr 2022
Height: 5'10
Weight: 122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Goal: 115.0 lbs / 52.15 kg / BMI 16.50
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
8 May
Ballet today and I'm so freaking excited and also nervous haha. My SO is wary too - she knows (carefully selected parts) about why I stopped dancing in the first place just before we got together, and even the curated version has her very oddly checking in on me and asking if it'll be okay and trying to emphasis how good it will be for me to dance again in a non-destructive way. This is awful of me given that it's just because she's worrying, but having her so suddenly being gentle with me again has been really nice. I'm not powering into it though I'm just easing back in. Starting off with once a week at the studio with the rest of the week on my barre at home, then I'll build it up from there. So, dance, then home to throw on some street appropriate clothes, then off to mother's Day lunch which remains largely a mystery. Hopefully it's not too crazy, I really want to try an eggplant dish tonight so I'll be bitter as if my calories get used up on one meal.
Anyway, onto the day.
Me: going back to ballet won't be triggering! I'm just excited!
Me: I can totally just stick to my normal safe meals with no issue once I'm dancing again!
Breakfast before dance:
Protein shake made with hot water, and a black coffee (135 calories).
So okay maybe my nice exciting Sunday breakfasts will need to be post-dance lunches. At least, on non mother's Day lunch sundays. Once I'm up the ranks again (new studio after a very, v e r y long break!) It'll probably take out my pre-dance dinners too lmao. That's a ways off anyway. Totally fine. It's fine. 🙂
Anyway, ballet was freaking amazing. I loved every second of it and I'm really keen to get big time back into it. It was so nice to be back at the barre, and I forgot how relaxing it could be in a big group like that.
Lunch for mother's Day after ballet was a mango and prawn salad with quinoa, and dessert was a slice of banana bread cake with date and cream cheese icing. Also some coffee naturally. I estimated it to be around 730 calories all up.
Then dinner at home was a really nice veggie dish - I effectively just cooked baba ghanoush but didn't blend it, and then just reduced the remaining sauce until it was super thick. Delish. About 132 calories.
~~~~~~~
Aaaaand then the reason I've been offline for so long.
My SO had my phone, hit back on the page it was on, and it went straight to the page I was browsing in EDC. Now, while she claimed she saw nothing and did hand it straight back, naturally I freaked and got upset. She got angry about me having private spaces online and 'shutting her out' after all the time we've been together, and it just felt like she was saying I wasn't allowed to have anything to myself. Said I should trust her after how long we've been together but the last year has just been one ugly mess of betrayals of trust. It was awful. Wound up having a panic attack on the lounge because she was just snapping at me over it all. So basically the solution is I'm just not going to update while I'm around her. I'll just use my lunch breaks at work or while she's busy doing something else I guess.
I've been so stressed since then that Ive been struggling with just about everything again. Which sucks. The last few days have been a blur of either no food or way too much and all the purging again - threw up at work, been chowing down laxatives like candy, exercising during my breaks at work. Chaos.
So yeah!
I'll be sneakily back now. I guess. FFS.
I hope you're all well ♡
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#152
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Posted 14 May 2022 - 03:36 PM
Weight: n/a
Steps: Didn't track
Intake: 982
TDEE: 1508
Net: -526
Days without b/p: 4
(TDEE as per Samsung watch)
Stats as at 20-Apr 2022
Height: 5'10
Weight: 122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Goal: 115.0 lbs / 52.15 kg / BMI 16.50
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
So skipping the 13th because I was too emotionally wiped to try to take photos and type stuff up while my fiancée was around. It was a weird day but I'm not gonna linger on that lmao. Onto the 14th!
Breakfast today! Higher cal than I'd usually do but I'm trying to mitigate the b/p thing I'm stuck in so.
Probiotic porridge sachet cooked with water, then mixed with half a scoop of chocolate protein powder, 0 fat 0 sugar berry yoghurt, tsp of psyllium husks, and then topped with Stevia sweetened PB2, three pitted prunes and noshu sugar free choc chips. Also with an instant coffee and a multivitamin drink. ♡ 404 calories.
Not me trying to fill my meals with fibre so I don't feel tempted by the box of lax in my bedside. Lmao.
For lunch I spiralled a zucchini and dry fried it until soft, then cooked it with a dolmio express pasta sauce. Topped with 5g parmesan. 156 calories.
Afternoon tea while studying was vitawerx protein chocolate and a sugar free avalanche hot chocolate. 183 calories. I'm waaaaaaay behind with uni rn because of how uncomfortable home has been - I can't focus while I'm so stressed so kind of dropped everything. Trying to catch up, big assessment piece due this coming Sunday.
Dinner was a pack of cauliflower rice, and an eggplant, red onion, tomato and jalapeno stir fry with garlic and PB2. 214 calories.
I also had a prune before bed (see: fibre) which was another ~25 calories by weight.
Day total came to 982.
I know I've said this before but I have a good feeling about being b/p free right now. Maybe nothing will go horribly wrong today, even though that seems to be the sunday tradition.
I hope you're all well ♡
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#153
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Posted Yesterday, 05:27 AM
Weight: n/a
Steps: 3166
Intake: 1061
TDEE: 1465 (@ 10pm, will update)
Net: -404
Days without b/p: 5
(TDEE as per Samsung watch)
Watch didn't track ballet??
Stats as at 20-Apr 2022
Height: 5'10
Weight: 122.5 lbs / 55.51 kg / BMI 17.56
Goal: 115.0 lbs / 52.15 kg / BMI 16.50
Tracking:
April 2022
15-Apr - 122.6 lbs / 55.60 kg / BMI 17.59
08-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
02-Apr - 123.8 lbs / 56.14 kg / BMI 17.76
01-Apr - 124.4 lbs / 56.42 kg / BMI 17.85
March 2022
29-Mar - 125.6 lbs / 56.96 kg / BMI 18.02
17-Mar - 127.6 lbs / 57.87 kg / BMI 18.31
02-Mar - 129.0 lbs / 59.50 kg / BMI 18.52
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
First of all, nothing bad happened. No fights, no arguments, no tense silence. It was honestly a huge relief to feel like I'm going into Monday not on the verge of a meltdown, and I genuinely had such a nice weekend with my fiancée. It really was so so nice to feel like I was spending time with her again, how she used to be with me all the time, and I feel so calm and at ease right now. No eggshells, nothing, it's so good. Today was so good. I do love her very much, I desperately miss how things used to be, and being able to honestly feel like this around her again was so, so good. We had a really nice chill time. 🥰 Anyway the rest was jotted down through the day so bear with the weird time shifts! Xx
Breakfast today before ballet - a chocolate protein shake made with hot water, an instant coffee, and a voost multivitamin. Liquids again because ig even with a huge break going to the studio with solids in my stomach is too spooky. Go figure. 142 calories. Now I'm gonna go panic and throw my hair into a bun because I've been scrolling ED content all morning instead of getting ready lol!
Ballet was great! A lot of it was at the barre today; we skipped out on the port de bras and did a bunch of rond de jambe and plié exercises. Felt really comfortable and focused. I am having trouble with my watch not logging my ballet workouts and just recommending I go do some breathing when my HR goes up (???) So idk how to fix that. Also means it's not counted towards my TDEE on my Samsung stuff by the looks of things so that's annoying. Guess it's motivation to get walking on ballet days lmao. I'll just keep using the Samsung figures for now and will puzzle it out some other time.
My post ballet lunch was the breakfast I wanted to have (lol), so a probiotic porridge sachet cooked with water and mixed with fat free 'n sugar free yoghurt, chocolate protein powder, and psyllium husk. Topped with PB2 and sugar free choc chips, and then heated up again until they were melting. Also four prunes and an instant coffee. Delish~ 435 calories.
Dinner was a massive veggie stir-fry (eggplant, tomato, onion, lemon juice, garlic) on cauliflower rice, with a PB2 sauce and sriracha. Crazy good and super filling! 230 calories.
Also unpictured and after dinner were three prunes (75), an avalanche sugar free hot choc (36), and a 30g vitawerx white choc bar (143). Can't always get snaps of everything now my SO is so wary.
Day total was 1061.
I'm not really feeling okay with my intake lately - it feels too high - but Im trying to remind myself that I'm just coming off the sharp end of a nasty b/p disaster so suddenly dropping my intake would send me right back there.
I hope you're all well ♡
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#154
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Posted Yesterday, 08:57 AM
duuude that stir fry!!! yum.
i'm glad things are calm and you're not going into the week feeling on edge. that's always a positive (:
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#155
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Posted Yesterday, 08:07 PM
#156
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Posted Yesterday, 08:08 PM
solenoid, on 15 May 2022 - 08:57 AM, said:
duuude that stir fry!!! yum.
i'm glad things are calm and you're not going into the week feeling on edge. that's always a positive (:
Aw thanks! It was soooo delish! ♥️♥️ And yeah such a relief to have a good start to the week, it's been super hectic. I hope you're doing well! Thanks for the kind words!
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Posted Yesterday, 01:35 PM
Exam tomorrow. I. Am scared. Not for this one that much, but for the rest. And if this one happens, it means the rest is coming as well. I ate okish today. Idk. I’m getting my period really really soon tho, so I expect the next time I update my weight hopefully hopefully hopefully I’ve lost. We’ll see I guess. Very short entry today, sorry! It’s gonna be like this for the next week and a half :/
Let’s go:
Breakfast: dak juk (320cal)
Dinner: curry and rice (194cal)
Snacks:
Coffee (48cal)
ladyfinger biscuits (195cal)
Cake roll thingy (75cal)
Exercise:
Water: 1.5l
Steps: 5000
Total: 831 net calories
Song: thursdays child has far to go- txt
cw: 56.5kg
lw: 46.3kg
hw: 70kg
ugw: 48(?)
height: 166.5cm
Accountability
‘My life is actually empty, so I feel like I'm lying to everyone by pretending to be happy on the outside.’ -Sulli
#25
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Posted Yesterday, 07:23 PM
good luck on your exams lovely <3
[16. 05. 22]
꒰ 5'3 • 56.05𝙠𝙜 • 21.4𝙗𝙢𝙞 • 𝙨𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙢𝙚 ꒱
56 55 54 53 52 51 50 49 48 47 (kg)
・♥・
✎◞ ˚ ༘♡ [ 7 ] days binge free
a c c o u n t a b i l i t y f a s t i n g t h i n s p o
𝚐𝚠𝟷:𝟺𝟽𝚔𝚐 ⇢ 𝟿.𝟶𝟼𝚔𝚐 𝚕𝚎𝚏𝚝 - 𝟺 𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚔𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚐𝚘!
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Posted 10 May 2022 - 07:23 AM
CleverCookie, on 08 May 2022 - 01:07 AM, said:
day 120, sun 8 may
[/spoiler]
You seem like such a wonderful cook omfg come cook for meeeeee!!!!
THAT LOOKS SO FUCKING GOOD OMGGGGGG 
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#254
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Posted 10 May 2022 - 01:25 PM
Bleak Cucumber, on 10 May 2022 - 07:22 AM, said:
Ugh, I'm so sorry I haven't been keeping up with your thread, sooo busy with exams :/
Oh my days that looks hilarious AF XD Like almost as if it's a prank hahaa
thats okay! i try keep up with threads but i barely leave comments oops, i usually read them while im on the go and dont have time lol
and I KNOW RIGHT it was like we were in a sitcom or something omggggg
we've been there a couple of times and their portions are always humongous but the food is good and we dont have a lot of friends LOL
Bleak Cucumber, on 10 May 2022 - 07:23 AM, said:
You seem like such a wonderful cook omfg come cook for meeeeee!!!!
THAT LOOKS SO FUCKING GOOD OMGGGGGG
haha thanks! i made them extra rich and chocolatey, plus the toppings on the brownie really made it instagram-able
I love cooking/baking but i dont do it often enough
i would say my bf might even be a better cook than me LOL he gets really into perfecting a dish, where as i just have fun slapping stuff together and eating it (¬‿¬ )
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#255
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Posted 10 May 2022 - 11:46 PM
day 122, wed 11 may
62.8kg
exercise: 6.5km jog + 1.4km walk, 1hr40min walking outside
steps: 23390 (6pm)
morning: green tea, coffee
afternoon: 95g banana (85), c/s'ed three bites of chicken and pasta lmfao, 1tbsp fibre
wow i havent c/s'ed in like five years i used to have a real problem with it (specifically pasta gets me i s2g its not even a desire to eat it but to just c/s it EXPLAIN) and itd make me feel worse than b/p'ing so lets hope that doesnt pick up anytime soon
anyway only three bites and im p good with it so the calories are like, less than 10 maybe
evening: tomato and vege soup w potato and bacon and parmesan cheese (200-300), bread (300), 1tbsp fibre, tea
scarfing down dinner at 5pm cuz i have an evening TA shift for some reason bye ┐(シ)┌
i love bread
total: 600-700
good night
food
#256
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Advanced Sage
- Locationnear the equator, in a really hot place
Posted 11 May 2022 - 03:34 AM
CleverCookie, on 10 May 2022 - 1:25 PM, said:
thats okay! i try keep up with threads but i barely leave comments oops, i usually read them while im on the go and dont have time lol
and I KNOW RIGHT it was like we were in a sitcom or something omggggg
we've been there a couple of times and their portions are always humongous but the food is good and we dont have a lot of friends LOL
haha thanks! i made them extra rich and chocolatey, plus the toppings on the brownie really made it instagram-able
I love cooking/baking but i dont do it often enough
i would say my bf might even be a better cook than me LOL he gets really into perfecting a dish, where as i just have fun slapping stuff together and eating it (¬‿¬ )
Hahaaa yeahh!
They really do look good tho lmao!
SAME, I rarely get time with school and work and badminton ugh. You're like me lmaoo, I just put stuff together and see if the combination works lmfaooo (I do weigh it though cause I can't eyeball weight, very bad at that)
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#257
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Advanced Sage
Posted 12 May 2022 - 01:41 AM
day 123, thu 12 may
62.5kg
exercise: 1hr55min walkign otuside, 25min more walking, 1hr15min more walking weeeeeeee
steps: 27106
morning: green tea, coffee
afternoon: hard boiled egg at like 4pm (80), 1tbsp fibre
evening: 150g banana and 170g persimmon (255), 1tbsp fibre, mixed nuts (390), one candy (32), tea
SO i was gonna go out to eat w bf after his work but he fuckin FORGOT cuz he's always working overtime and i walked there and waited for like 30minutes to get GHOSTED and then went home lmfao what an ass
anyway he was super sorry and actually got me a small bouquet of apology flowers, a card, and a bag of my favourite candies (which i am now tasked with eating one a day for like the next month) so he's still a bae and its ok and it was pretty funny i should make him late more often (¬‿¬ )
i did end up eating late at like 8-8.30pm since i had to walk home in the dark but like whatever
total: 757
good night
food
#258
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- 1807 posts
Advanced Sage
Posted 13 May 2022 - 01:00 AM
day 124, fri 13 may
62.2kg
exercise: 5km jog + 1.4km walk, 1hr30min walking outside
steps: 20920 (7.30pm)
morning: green tea, coffee
afternoon: slice of processed cheese (80), 1tbsp fibre, piece of candy (32), powerade (10)
evening: collagen broth (45), 1tbsp fibre, rice w kimchi (155), stewed chicken n vege n potato also an egg (300), fermented soybeans (90), piece of candy (32), tea
if i can fit two candies in a day then great cuz theres like 25 of them
anyway i had a bunch of extra calories (powerade, broth, soybeans) cuz my leg muscles feel strained today
tomorrow bf and i are going out for dinner probably to that korean place again and probably to get a massive hotpot "for two" teehee
kind of keen to get under 60kg asap and every time i eat there i gain the next day lmao but its whatever i guess
total: 744
good night
food
#259
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- 1807 posts
Advanced Sage
Posted 14 May 2022 - 01:53 AM
day 125, sat 14 may
62.7kg
not me saying how i need to get out of the 60s then gaining a pound randomly overnight (っಠ‿ಠ)っ
im not too hooked on the weight thing i just seriously need new clothes
im still wearing the same clothes as i did when i was like 50lbs heavier so like
yeah
exercise: 50min walking outside, 25min walking outside
steps: 14374
morning: green tea, coffee
afternoon: rockstar energy and a piece of candy (45)
evening: 1tbsp fibre, korean hotpottttt - chicken and vege with tteokboki and sweet potato and also like 100cal worth of rice, strawberry halotop (100), tea
bf and i went to that korean place again and had their basic chicken stirfry/hotpot which was 10/10
probably will go back regularly to try out all their stuff
we got it spicy even though bf literally has a medical condition where spicy food is BAD but he's kind of a dumbass and probably dead as hell tomorrow lol
but i LOVE spicy food and this was acceptably spicy (as in painfully spicy) but i kind of wanted it more spicy but whatever it was delicious
total: 900-1000?
good night
food
mixed up
adding a bowl of white rice toward the end was the right move
the rice soaks up some of the slight sweetness of the hotpot and just (っ˘ڡ˘ς)
#260
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Advanced Sage
Posted Yesterday, 01:37 AM
day 126, sun 15 may
62.3kg
exercise: 5km jog + 1.4km walk
steps: 15265
easily the best run ever today i went fast as hell
morning: green tea, coffee
afternoon: 1tbsp fibre, two smoll bites of rice paper roll (20), roast vege and a little bit of chicken (160), coke, few spoonfuls of ice cream (50)
bf and i went to the rich people mall today in the rich people part of the city and i dropped like 700 on a nice down jacket and some fly as hell doc martens (i learned what doc martens are) and also a pair of the white flat shoes with the cute crocodile on them
learned a lot about shoes today
evening: night markettttttt - pork belly and kimchi lettuce wraps (200), two pork shaomai (130), vege sticks with some mayo (25), 1tbsp fibre, piece of candy (32), tea, lemon water
total: 600, probably less but everything was guessed today so its unnerving lol
good night
food
crispy chicken roll and lemongrass chicken roll
roast chicken meal from a carvery, was very nice also mmmmm potatoes and starch
mango yoghurt lassi ice cream and chocolate ice cream, both were great
- Accountability access
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Advanced Sage
- Locationizaya's apartment
Posted Yesterday, 10:59 PM
I mighve over estimate some.
"You think you're special? You're not. Everyone lies, everyone hides things...
Nobody makes it through this life being completely honest."
---------------
cw/lw: 97.8
hw: 181 lbs
gw1: 150 bs
gw2: 135 lbs
ugw: 93lbs
5'7
ive lost 50+ pounds and it feels and looks like ive lost none :/
how the fuck am i bmi 15 lol
---------------
---------------
Do you think mukbangers are bulimic
#1
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- 233 posts
Warrior
Posted 24 April 2022 - 02:15 PM
Do you think they purge afterwards? During filming and then continue eating? Or do you think they don't vomit but fast for a long time and then film one binge?
Obviously this is very generalizing right now, I just want to hear some thoughts on that
#2
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Advanced Warrior
- LocationNetherlands
Posted 24 April 2022 - 02:42 PM
eric the electric is openly an exercise bulimic, in fact i think most of them are to some extent. i don't know about purging through vomiting though...
sometimes while i watch mukbangs, i think about what the purging experience from them would be. like, "omg, so much buldak sauce, their throat is gonna be on fire when they purge all that!" or "that meat looks so dense, i wonder how long they'll have to flush to get it out!"
#3
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0kcal cat
Posted 24 April 2022 - 03:40 PM
the people who do mukbangs very regularly and eat huge amounts of food probably are. but idk if it's technically considered bulimia unless they're specifically compensating for a binge vs maintaining health. there is a very fine line with these things though but there are definitely some I suspect eat and yeet.
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- 1071 posts
Sage
- LocationItaly
Posted 04 May 2022 - 07:37 AM
Joining.
Twisting deep inside of me,
Forever missing, the glistening.
— SOiL, Unreal.
28. Italy. EDNOS/OSFED.
Flexitarian because of reasons, avoiding meat as much as possible for the environment.
Drugs and alcohol are my only friends.
Blog: [⛔ for friends only ⛔]
Introduction: [here]
Current accountability thread: [here]
◾ Competitions and Challenges ◾
🌈 August Rainbow Challenge 2021
July 10th: -3 (orange)
July 12th: -4 (yellow)
July 26th: -7 (purple)
The August 100% Gold Challenge
SW: 111.7 lbs
❖ The July 100% Gold Challenge
July 10th: 30%
July 12th: 40%
July 26th: 70%
Rank (July 2nd): Stranger
Rank (July 10th): Warhero
Rank (July 12th): Duchess
Rank (July 25th): Empress
✨ GW: 109 lbs ✨
☆ 7th day (August 2nd):
☆ 15th day (August 10th):
#163
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- 15814 posts
Choose your own title! PM Admin or Bibs.
- LocationBerlin
Posted 04 May 2022 - 09:01 AM
why is my weight always stucking i'm frustrated
68,9 - 67 - 66 - 65 - 64 - 63 - 62 - 61 - 60
- 59 - 58 - 57 - 56 - 55 - 54 - 53 - 52 - 51 - 50 -
49 - 48 - 47 - 46 - 45
SW: 68,9 kg
CW: 51,6 kg
GW 1: 65 kg
GW 2: 60 kg
GW 3: 55 kg
GW 4: 50 kg
UGW: 45 kg
accountability: 2022
#164
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- 456 posts
Advanced Warrior
- LocationEarth (Unfortunately)
#165
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- 529 posts
Guru
- LocationFinland
Posted 04 May 2022 - 09:36 AM
just added myself, hoping for a better month. aiming for -10
#167
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- 244 posts
Advanced Warrior
- Locationon ur shelf
Posted 04 May 2022 - 01:19 PM
i re-weighed myself and updated my column from this morning. hope that's okay! my original weight was from really early in the morning, so i feel this update is more accurate.
#169
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Omniscient
- Locationbumfuck nowhere
Posted 04 May 2022 - 05:19 PM
This is so awesome! Glad to join!
Desmond/Des/Mosh
Current Weight and BMI
201.2 / 36.8 (05.13.2022)
26
closeted questioning ftm gender dysphoria pls use they/them or he/him
my new accountability: Coming Undone - Mosh's accountability - Higher BMI accountability Forum - Forums and Community (myproana.com)
#170
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- 167 posts
Warrior
Posted 04 May 2022 - 06:29 PM
I put on a little bit in the last couple days. Not really surprised because my SW on May 1rst was a little bit lower than I'd expected, but still feel crappy about it.
#171
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- 255 posts
Advanced Warrior
Posted 05 May 2022 - 12:23 AM
I’m 1.6lbs away from getting out of the 60s, and 3.8 lbs away from getting out of the 130s, sincerely hope this happens this month!
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#172
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#173
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- 904 posts
Sage
- LocationThe Fridge
Posted 05 May 2022 - 12:51 AM
Friendship ended with plateau
Losing 0.5 kg is now my best friend ✨
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#174
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#175
- Members
- 19 posts
Member
- LocationUK
Posted 05 May 2022 - 01:53 AM
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#176
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- 233 posts
Warrior
Posted 05 May 2022 - 03:02 AM
I am such a fucking failure honestly, I keep gaining and gaining and idk why, I should be losing at least a bit based on what I eat but no I'm just getting fatter and fatter
everyone must think I'm such a fake and seeing my failure compared to everyone elses' success sucks so much
#177
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#178
- Members
- 41 posts
Member
- Locationur moms house
Posted 05 May 2022 - 07:22 AM
workingonit123, on 05 May 2022 - 04:45 AM, said:
I can't edit my cw for some reason.
its automatic, all you have to do is add a new weight in the numbered columns on the right every time u weigh in
#180
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Guru
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