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#65920069** 180's to 140's since November '18 ** - GW 105 (30+ y/o)
Posted by on 24 December 2018 - 02:54 AM in Accountability
#65920053Would you feel/do you feel fat at BMI 19,5?
Posted by on 24 December 2018 - 02:48 AM in Off Topic Discussions
#65920035What's your MVP (most valuable potato)?
Posted by on 24 December 2018 - 02:42 AM in Off Topic Discussions
#65920015Get Out of the 130's?!
Posted by on 24 December 2018 - 02:38 AM in Higher BMI accountability Forum
#65560417Who Has Daughters?
Posted by on 24 November 2018 - 02:47 AM in Age 30+
#65560397How did thanksgiving go for everyone?
Posted by on 24 November 2018 - 02:43 AM in Age 30+
#65560377purging when pregnant
Posted by on 24 November 2018 - 02:39 AM in Bulimia Discussions
#65560325how much do you weigh
Posted by on 24 November 2018 - 02:26 AM in Bulimia Discussions
#64905213What are your cravings?
Posted by on 13 September 2018 - 06:40 AM in Pregnancy
#64905207BMI when you conceived
Posted by on 13 September 2018 - 06:39 AM in Pregnancy
#64905173Pregnant with fifth child and confused
Posted by on 13 September 2018 - 06:27 AM in Pregnancy
Thanl you. I agree with you. I'm also pro choice. But I've had three abortions with my husband and I told myself that I'd never have one again. Plus life is so short. I know that now. This baby was sent to me for a purpose. I can't really tell my family or anyone cause everyone would judge me. And he might leave me. But there are lots of strong single moms out there. I don't know. My life is so crazy right now. It's like a soap opera or something.
Roo-barb, on 12 Sept 2018 - 11:43 PM, said:
You should definitely not hav an abortion for him. If you want this child it is your decision. If you already know you'll regret it, it could be so damaging to your mental health. Imo it's manipulative and unfair of him to say he'd kill himself. He made this baby too he needs to take responsibility and not just expect you to get rid of it.
For the record I'm pro choice I'm not just trying to convince you to keep the baby.
Sent from my EML-L29 using Tapatalk
#64903521Pregnant with fifth child and confused
Posted by on 12 September 2018 - 10:33 PM in Pregnancy
Well now I found out I'm pregnant two days ago. I have not been healthy. Not eating, purging, binge drinking and smoking daily. I stopped once I got the positive test. Except like three cigs a day. In my heart, my first instinct is to keep this baby. But he says it will destroy our future. That he'll lose everything and we'll have nothing to build up from. Plus I have no job. I was a stay at home mom for ten years. And my cash assistance runs out after next month. So I have like a month and a half to find a job. Plus I already have four kids.
What the fuck am I supposed to??? I know if I abort I'll regret it the rest of my life and probably completely destroy myself. But if I keep it I think he'll leave me. When I told him he said he'd kill himself. The abortion is completely his idea. But he says he's thinking about all of us. That we just can't have a baby right now.
What do you guys think? I'm so fucking confused and hate my life.
#62011114Getting out of the 160s!
Posted by on 22 May 2018 - 07:02 AM in Higher BMI accountability Forum
#62009530+30 ana buddies
Posted by on 22 May 2018 - 06:25 AM in Age 30+
#62009514+30 ana buddies
Posted by on 22 May 2018 - 06:25 AM in Age 30+
#60199026At What Age Did You Started to Feel the Pressure of Being Skinny?
Posted by on 21 April 2018 - 11:44 AM in Anorexia Discussions
LylaMae, on 17 Mar 2018 - 4:29 PM, said:
Never ever felt any pressure of being thin let alone skinny.
My dad was murdered, stabbed to death, when I was 19.
My life spun out of control from that moment on and the only thing I (felt) I had my control over from that moment on was my weight
I just want to say I'm sorry you lost your dad in such a horrific way. And so young. 💔 I also lost my dad at 19 (cancer) and that's when my ED took off.
#60198802At What Age Did You Started to Feel the Pressure of Being Skinny?
Posted by on 21 April 2018 - 11:40 AM in Anorexia Discussions
#57841010anyone else 30+ and still puking?
Posted by on 19 March 2018 - 04:28 AM in Age 30+
#57840610Worst things to throw up?
Posted by on 19 March 2018 - 04:20 AM in Bulimia Discussions
#57495818What is motivating you right now to lose weight?
Posted by on 14 March 2018 - 09:19 AM in Anorexia Discussions
#57372922Would you consider me young still
Posted by on 12 March 2018 - 02:41 PM in Off Topic Discussions
#57371122Was anyone else triggered by aging?
Posted by on 12 March 2018 - 02:09 PM in Age 30+
#57371106Was anyone else triggered by aging?
Posted by on 12 March 2018 - 02:09 PM in Age 30+
#57370002Bed death?
Posted by on 12 March 2018 - 01:53 PM in Age 30+
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Did anyone unknowingly have a form of binge-eating as a child (since "for...
Posted by on 09 March 2018 - 12:29 PM in BED Discussions
#57161546is it possible that someone who had BED for 3 years is at a normal weight?
Posted by on 09 March 2018 - 12:26 PM in BED Discussions
#57151410My body image is shit - how do I look in these photos?
Posted by on 09 March 2018 - 08:49 AM in Selfies
#56720306Older Women....do You Feel It's All Too Late ?
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 02:11 PM in Age 30+
#56719906do you find yourself getting annoyed at teenagers thinking they're way mo...
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 02:02 PM in Age 30+
cannedpeaches, on 24 Feb 2018 - 08:46 AM, said:
it doesn't really bother me honestly.
or maybe i just haven't noticed.
although i havent heard any teen convos recently.
i will say this:
theyre teens.
theyre getting used to adulthood and
becoming independent of their parents.
and thats a big deal.
so i feel its natural to want to be intimate or
be close to someone as that parental intimacy dissipates.
and maybe its a development thing.
or an experience thing.
i just let them be.
honestly lol i get more annoyed with older people.
like i feel older people can feel more established.
theyve had a job long term, etc.
so idk maybe they feel they know more than someone younger.
thats annoying to me.
cause i mean, i feel like there are younger
people who could teach me a lot.
and actually on this site a lot of them do.
edit:
i dont want to talk about teenagers
like i know what theyre going through.
but i guess i kind of did and i think
that mostly reflects my life.
i dont think anyone ever stops being a teenager.
or stops being a toddler or child or baby.
i mean, im an 'adult' and i cry like a baby.
or go through identity and puberty like a teenager.
and i have to do adult things like make appointments,
pick up my meds, buy food.
im still a child but there is and adult part of me that takes care
of the child me.
This almost read like a poem. Something is very beautiful about it. ❤️
#56719650How many active members 30+ age range ?
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 01:57 PM in Age 30+
#56717450pregnancy again :(
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 01:25 PM in Parents with ED
#56716882Any moms on here still struggling with their eating disorder?
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 01:16 PM in Parents with ED
#56710818before and after pics
Posted by on 03 March 2018 - 11:41 AM in Diet Results
#56535538Vegan hsgd
Posted by on 01 March 2018 - 04:20 AM in Skinny Girl Diet
#54753201help I’m getting heart palaptations at 1000 cals
Posted by on 05 February 2018 - 10:30 AM in Anorexia Discussions
#54752361low cal satiating oatmeal...takes about 1hr to eat (317cals) :)
Posted by on 05 February 2018 - 10:23 AM in Anorexia Discussions
#54751873What Did You Binge On: Othorexic Version
Posted by on 05 February 2018 - 10:20 AM in Orthorexia
#53127289Stay at home mom here
Posted by on 15 January 2018 - 05:17 AM in Age 30+
do you find yourself getting annoyed at teenagers thinking they're way more mature than they are?
#1 
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Posted 04 February 2018 - 03:54 PM
I used to try to give teenagers the benefit of the doubt in my twenties, but I'm gonna be 31 this year and like ... seeing kids in high school talk about having sex with some guy they just met a week ago and how he's perfect and treats them so well but like ... this will be a 16 year old talking about a 21 year old or something and it's a little creepy to me, that a 21 year old would want to have sex with a 16 year old, and they refuse to hear any opinion about how that could be really unhealthy? or just making very poor life choices in general and it's like ... if you're not mature enough to have safe sex and open discussions with your partner and not put yourself in a position where you could get pregnant or an STI (i mean, we all make mistakes, i just caught my first STI a couple months ago because my partner thought he was clean and we decided not to use a condom, but we discussed it first and he genuinely had no idea) then you probably shouldn't have sex even though you want to? idk i just feel like i don't have the patience for teenagers anymore making bad decisions involving drugs or sex or alcohol and then having to deal with the consequences and freaking out about it, like ... if you aren't mature enough to handle the consequences that COULD happen, don't engage in them in the first place?
like ... i'm not calling anybody out specifically, just venting about what i see online all the time on various websites
#2 Guest_Abi C._*
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Posted 04 February 2018 - 04:00 PM
Do not blame them. Their frontal lobes are not yet fully developed. They know not what they do.
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#3
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Posted 04 February 2018 - 04:09 PM
omg YES. I get annoyed at teenagers since I was a teenager lol I was never friends with them, always liked older people more.
Seeing someone underage drinking and/or smoking makes me want to slap them in the face. Also when there's a bunch of loud and confident teenagers walking next to me I just go like
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#4
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Posted 04 February 2018 - 06:38 PM
No, it just amuses me and makes me shake my head.
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#5 Guest_RockRabbit_*
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Posted 05 February 2018 - 05:58 AM
It's part of being a teen. If you think about it, they're the oldest they've ever been, so they just don't know better. 
Sometimes you can take them down gently on it, but teen brains are designed to rebel and also don't have consistent empathy to see where others are at.
I recommend grinning and bearing it, unless something really needs challenging - and when you do challenge it helps to be humble about your own experiences both as a mature adult and as a young person, so they don't just feel attacked.
#6
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Posted 05 February 2018 - 11:34 AM
I suspect I may have been one of those who thought I was more mature than I was.
I think overall I did okay, but wow... definitely a lot of poor decision making involved while I navigated my teens and early twenties. 
I just smile and think to myself that they'll get there eventually, and sometimes it's learning the hard way.
Not all who wander are lost... but I am. | Accountability | 5'8" | BMI 21.5 | 150 145 140 135 130 125 120
#7
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Posted 05 February 2018 - 12:04 PM
I hear you. They act more mature than they are, but still in that regard it makes it immature (because of the decisions and choices they're making)
I was an extremely cynical teenager, and I was TOO mature at times (to the point of just being like an old crotchety lady). I would see my peers at the time doing dumb stuff like that, and would just be frustrated, wondering why they couldn't make smarter choices.. I plateaued at 15, haha... I was so far ahead, and now so far behind.
But you also have to chalk it up to making mistakes and (hopefully) learning from them..
meowkiller, on 04 Feb 2018 - 4:09 PM, said:
THIS! I have always pretty much had this reaction to teenagers.
#8
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Posted 05 February 2018 - 04:36 PM
The making mistakes doesn't annoy me much.
It worries me sometimes.
I wonder if our generation sometimes too ...
The only thing that really annoys me is when they're disrespectful.
But then I disliked it from other teenagers when I was one.
You know, bad manners and bratty attitude
#9
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Posted 05 February 2018 - 10:31 PM
A lot of the traits that I am annoyed by in teenagers are ones that I definitely was guilty of, so I try to have some compassion haha! I hate when teenagers get all hyper and giggly and talk so loud in public places, but that was so me and my best friend in high school. I kind of shake my head and don't say anything about the "maturity" that teens think they have. I have a sister that is turning 18 this month and she is like that. The only way for them to change is to learn through mistakes, so it isn't like me saying anything is going to help. I remember being a teen and thinking my parents/adults didn't know anything.
I second the frontal lobe thing. No impulse control or reasoning skills.
#10
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Posted 08 February 2018 - 04:35 AM
Yes, especially when they refer to themselves as "an old soul."
I used to hang out with an older crowd when I was a teenager, and I thought I was so above other teenagers and so mature. At the time, I didn't realize I was vulnerable and being taken advantage of by creeps and weirdos.
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Posted 18 February 2018 - 01:46 PM
#13
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Posted 18 February 2018 - 03:45 PM
I know what you mean. It's hard for me to relate to it because I never had that attitude personally. I was an unbelievably cautious teenager. A mothers @#$%ing dream. It's only when I got older that I ran into trouble lol
#14
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Posted 20 February 2018 - 08:22 AM
No because I was one of those assholes myself.
Now, I just smile when they start preaching.
Honey child, you'll learn.
#15
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Posted 24 February 2018 - 08:46 AM
it doesn't really bother me honestly.
or maybe i just haven't noticed.
although i havent heard any teen convos recently.
i will say this:
theyre teens.
theyre getting used to adulthood and
becoming independent of their parents.
and thats a big deal.
so i feel its natural to want to be intimate or
be close to someone as that parental intimacy dissipates.
and maybe its a development thing.
or an experience thing.
i just let them be.
honestly lol i get more annoyed with older people.
like i feel older people can feel more established.
theyve had a job long term, etc.
so idk maybe they feel they know more than someone younger.
thats annoying to me.
cause i mean, i feel like there are younger
people who could teach me a lot.
and actually on this site a lot of them do.
edit:
i dont want to talk about teenagers
like i know what theyre going through.
but i guess i kind of did and i think
that mostly reflects my life.
i dont think anyone ever stops being a teenager.
or stops being a toddler or child or baby.
i mean, im an 'adult' and i cry like a baby.
or go through identity and puberty like a teenager.
and i have to do adult things like make appointments,
pick up my meds, buy food.
im still a child but there is and adult part of me that takes care
of the child me.
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#16
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Posted 24 February 2018 - 08:48 AM
Just about all teenagers think they're all grown up. If I think back to how 'mature' I thought I was at 16, I cringe so hard.
#17 Guest_RabbitInTheMoon_*
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Posted 24 February 2018 - 08:53 AM
Everybody has to make their share of stupid mistakes. It's the only way we learn sometimes.
I don't get annoyed, I just feel bad for them and wish they could learn from mine.
#18
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Posted 26 February 2018 - 01:28 PM
I'm much more annoyed by people who are like 45+ bragging about their age when it comes to debates and arguments as though their age correlates with wisdom when they can barely string a sentence together. Or older people who align with politics which were popular in their youth, but haven't learned a single thing down the line or bothered to keep up with current politics.
That said, I've seen more teens who come across as way more intelligent and switched-on than when I was a teen. I have lots of admiration for the maturity of teens these days compared to early 2000s.
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#19
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Posted 26 February 2018 - 02:29 PM
faderfairy, on 26 Feb 2018 - 1:28 PM, said:
I'm much more annoyed by people who are like 45+ bragging about their age when it comes to debates and arguments as though their age correlates with wisdom when they can barely string a sentence together. Or older people who align with politics which were popular in their youth, but haven't learned a single thing down the line or bothered to keep up with current politics.
That said, I've seen more teens who come across as way more intelligent and switched-on than when I was a teen. I have lots of admiration for the maturity of teens these days compared to early 2000s.
this is a very good point on both respects
#20
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Posted 26 February 2018 - 06:08 PM
Reply to this topic
Metabolic Burnout is a Bitch
#1
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Posted 24 July 2017 - 01:59 AM
23 July 2017 Starting Weight: 83kg // 182lbs // BMI 25.9
18 November 2017 Current Weight: 73.9 // 162.9lbs // BMI 23.1
Lost so far: 9.1kg // 20lbs
Height: 5'10.5''
GW1: 80kg // 176lbs // BMI 24.97 NEW JEANS, HAIR CUT & COLOUR Deadline: 1 August 2017
GW2: 75kg // 165lbs // BMI 23.41 Deadline: 5 November 2017
GW3: 70kg // 154lbs // BMI 21.8 Deadline: 31 December 2017
GW4: 65kg // 143lbs // BMI 20.29 Deadline: 28 February 2018
GW5: 60kg // 132lbs // BMI 18.7 Deadline: 30 April 2018
UGW: 55kg // 121lbs // BMI 17.2 Deadline: 8 June 2018
Other goals:
Pay off all store cards
Pay off all credit cards
Start Pilates
Start going for facials/spa treatments
Get teeth fixed
Cut and dye hair
New wardrobe
#2
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Wannarexic scum
- LocationIn the temple of the Goddess Ana.
Posted 24 July 2017 - 05:13 AM
Good luck
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Super awesome threads:
I think I might be allergic to my girlfriend.
I'm not okay but that's okay.
I'm not suicidal I'm die-curious.
#3
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- LocationTacky Art Nouveau Apartment
#4
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- LocationTacky Art Nouveau Apartment
Posted 24 July 2017 - 11:26 PM
Yesterday went well, made some adjustments to dinner when I realised that I didn't have broccoli lol. I need to get more chickpeas today too.
Today's plan is similar:
Breakfast: Oatmeal (70)
Afternoon grazing: Yogurt (100), Apple (70), Banana (60), Raisins (60), crackerbread & cream cheese (100)
Dinner: Haven't decided yet
Total so far: 460
I'm planning to work out tonight so I'll probably need to have a semi-decent dinner but I don't know what I want. I might make some sort of a grain salad? Off to Pinterest for ideas!
#5
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Posted 25 July 2017 - 06:26 AM
Just worked out my TDEE for interest sake and it says my BMR is 1633 and my TDEE is 2007.
Not like I'm going to use this or anything but there it is. Maybe I'll do this again once I've lost some weight to see how it changes.
#6
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- LocationTacky Art Nouveau Apartment
#7
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Posted 25 July 2017 - 11:43 AM
Today was good.
The only annoying thing is I had cauliflower last night and I'm still bloated and gassy from it 
#8
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Posted 25 July 2017 - 01:02 PM
I thought I'd do something different and post pics of some of my meals.
Here is my dinner (about 550 calories):
This is my afternoon snack that I had at work an hour before closing so I'd have enough energy to work out (I did 30 minutes of bodyweight exercises):
Also I discovered this recipe that is amazing:
Tuna Tart makes 4 servings
1 can tuna (190-200g)
half cup flour (self raising, or add half tsp baking powder)
half cup parmesan (grated)
3 large eggs
2 cups milk
onions (optional)
chives, crushed garlic, cayenne pepper, salt, pepper
Mix all of the above together, put in a cake tin/quiche pan, bake on 180 degrees celsius for 45 minutes to an hour.
Calories per serving: 203
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#9
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#10
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Posted 26 July 2017 - 03:56 AM
I found this delicious stuff while I was at Woolworths during my lunch break.
It's only 63 calories for that 40g tub. I got some an olive tepenade one too but it's higher cal so I'll save it for a day when I work out. I just added it on top of my cream cheese crackerbread and it was SO GOOD. I only used 20g so really very little calories and so much flavour! Lunch today was 132 calories.
#11
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Posted 26 July 2017 - 10:02 AM
Almost reached 1200 calories today but I'm not too concerned about it. I'm done eating for tonight. My husband and I are off to bible study and there are usually snacks so I'll just be having some black rooibos and conversation.
I also had two BM's today which I'm pleased about.
The tuna tart was amazing, my husband loved it and I will definitely make it again, maybe even with salmon or crab if it gets boring. For 200 calories a serving it's so filling!
I'm also happy because tonight we gave away this single bed our friends sort of dumped on us. They are emigrating and 'borrowed' us the bed with no intention of ever taking it back. We donated it to one of the church missions and the collected it tonight, so our one bedroom flat is looking way more spacious! Feels like a huge blockage has been removed from our life.
#12
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Posted 26 July 2017 - 09:21 PM
I haven't seen that in so long...
#13
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Posted 27 July 2017 - 12:19 AM
Guys...
I have been freaking out because I kinda sorta didn't file my tax returns for like 5 years (we have a really weird website in SA and I couldn't log in to it and just sort of gave up).
But I busted in, submitted my returns, and now I'm getting over 5k tax refund. 
Praise God!!! I was so stressed and praying about it at like 3am this morning because I couldn't get the bloody thing to work and then I found out I have to use it on Internet Explorer 
#14
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Posted 27 July 2017 - 10:15 AM
#15
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Posted 27 July 2017 - 09:30 PM
Not surprised since I ate higher cal yesterday. Relieved I didn't gain but slightly annnoyed I'm not seeing those high 70s!
Going to keep following the plan today.
#16
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Posted 28 July 2017 - 12:40 AM
I'm in such a bad mood today. But seriously, three days in a row at work alone at reception dealing with stupid fucking old people and the most annoying coworker (who thinks he is my boss) is seriously starting to wear me down.
#17 Guest_FriesBeforeGuys_*
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#18
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#19 Guest_FriesBeforeGuys_*
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Posted 28 July 2017 - 01:12 AM
chanelmermaid, on 28 Jul 2017 - 01:10 AM, said:
Yes I am. I'm an american, married a South African, living in Klerksdorp currently.Yes, are you also one?
So hey there beautiful!
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#20
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Posted 28 July 2017 - 01:18 AM
FriesBeforeGuys, on 28 Jul 2017 - 01:12 AM, said:
Yes I am. I'm an american, married a South African, living in Klerksdorp currently.
So hey there beautiful!
Hey gorgeous I live with my husband in Pretoria!
5'5"/high restriction/healthy BMI goal/semi-recovered
#1
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Posted 27 March 2020 - 01:53 PM
I'm sure no one remembers me but I'm back! Used to have an accountability but decided to start over.
I'm S. 31 years old. Husband & son. I love ballet and have danced since I was younger. Not too much anymore but would love to get back into taking classes. I love reading, hiking, journaling and occasionally (okay, a lot since COVID-19) playing video games.
I have dealt with EDNOS with an emphasis on purging since I was 15/16. Once I started nearing that 30 year mark I decided it was time to get serious about recovery, or at least as serious as I could get. I took a few years but I managed to go from daily purging to almost no purging. Last year was my record with about 5 b/p episodes for the entire year. I'm really, REALLY proud of this and my goal here isn't to relapse back into BN. What works for me is pushing through binges no matter what and not restricting too low, which can trigger binge eating for me. So I won't be fasting (maybe some IF) or restricting under 1,200-1,500.
I am currently 127.6 which is the heaviest I have been in awhile. I don't want to be underweight and my goal is somewhere between a toned 115-120lbs, I really love being under 20 BMI.
I'm going to include food pictures, daily journal logs and some body checks here and there. I am going to try my best not to include calorie intake but may at some point do so.
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#2
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Posted 27 March 2020 - 04:18 PM
Okay so here goes.
CW: 127.6
GW: 120
Breakfast: mango/banana/yogurt smoothie
Lunch: cauliflower w/ hot sauce
Dinner: spaghetti w/ black beans/olives/sm. serv. parmesan cheese
Took photos of all my food but for some reason the links aren't working?? So weird. I remember MPA having this problem for me before.
Today has been good so far, feeling really triggered with the number on the scale this morning. Still can't seem to get myself to exercise which I probably should be doing. Going to drink a lax tea and hopefully that will help, I ate chinese food yesterday and think I'm really bloated/retaining water.
I need to get out and walk. I have been cooped up in my house for almost a week now and barely go out anymore as my husband does the grocery shopping. I'm enjoying not working and being able to go to bed late and sleep in, plus read for however long I want. I also miss my routine though and I don't know how much longer I will be able to do this. I wish we had an end date in front of us, even if it was a couple months I would be OK with at least knowing when it would be over.
#3
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Posted 28 March 2020 - 06:30 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: 127.3 (-.3)
GW: 120
Breakfast: two mandarin oranges
Lunch: spaghetti w/ black bean & sprinkle of parmesan cheese + small slice sourdough bread
Snack: roasted asparagus w/ 1/2 tbsp veganaise
Dinner: fried brown rice w/ egg, broccoli, carrots and edamame
Went hiking today and it felt so good to get outside. We went to an isolated hiking trail and didn't see many people out. It was beautiful and misty out, not quite raining. It felt so good to get out and use my body, we climbed over rocks and went out quite a ways, I was huffing and puffing at certain points which is sad. I was worried this morning that I was going to have another triggering day like yesterday where I was constantly online and triggering myself with body check photos but I was able to get out of my head and actually live a bit. I still want to do this accountability but I have to be so careful not to go down the rabbit hole.
Weighed in a little less today even though I ended up doing a semi-binge last night, ugh. Once I started I couldn't seem to stop. It wasn't horrible but I hate when I get like that. We have my "normal" dessert now because we went shopping for the first time since the shelter in place mandate. It is a cereal from Trader Joes that is healthy and we bought some more almond milk. That is my safe dessert and if I have anything after dinner, I will just have that.
#4
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Posted 29 March 2020 - 08:03 PM
CW: 126.1 (-1.2)
GW: 120
Breakfast: nine grain oatmeal with a bit of muesli, blueberries + soy milk
Lunch: vegan pad thai with tofu, broccoli and peas
Snack: skyr yogurt
Dinner: spaghetti w/ black bean & sprinkle of parmesan cheese + small slice sourdough bread
Had a decent dip in weight today so I'm thinking I may have been bloated or retaining water from that Chinese takeout. I can't imagine I lost over a pound in a couple days eating the way I have been. But it was nice to see! Being under 125 has been my "recovery" safe weight, so the sooner I'm under that, the better.
Today was pretty uneventful. Trump made the declaration for social distancing through April, which means I won't be going back to work until at least May. Feels so crazy and unreal. I'm doing okay considering but it is still stressful. I need to find some kind of balance to my days, right now it consists of me sleeping in super late, playing video games, browsing the internet and taking occasional walks. I would like to have more of a schedule but we'll see how I feel.
My son starts online learning next week due to the school closures and it is kind of stressful trying to manage it all even though I know I don't have anything else to do and sound so lazy. I am taking one online college math course but that is it.
#5
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Posted 30 March 2020 - 07:46 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: 125.9 (-.2)
GW: 120
Breakfast: spinach omelette w/ sourdough toast
Lunch: vegan pad thai with tofu, broccoli and peas
Snack: orange
Dinner: top ramen w/ tofu and broccoli
I have seen a consistent loss for the last few days and honestly I'm shook. It must be water weight, that is all I can think. I haven't been restricting very much (obviously) but I think I have been in a deficit somewhat.
Another day in the lockdown, nothing much to report. Feeling a little anxious but I think that has to do more with the fact that my period is looming and I always get weird PMS symptoms right before.
Want to get back to doing some ballet videos for exercise, I have been incredibly lazy except for my dog walks x3 a day.
#6
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Posted 31 March 2020 - 06:49 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: 124.8 (-1.1)
GW: 120
Breakfast: green smoothie with spinach, frozen mango, banana + soy milk
Lunch: fried brown rice with edamame, broccoli, egg + carrots
Dinner: veggie hotdog on whole wheat bun
For whatever reason I can't upload from image.farm here and it is so frustrating. I'm too lazy to upload anywhere else seeing as I use image.farm for other forums. Oooop. I usually post food pics/progress pics.
So surprised at my weight still going down. I have to believe it will stagnate or go up in the next few days, especially with a period looming.
Really low in daily intake today (900) so I added to MFP a bowl of bran flakes with a sprinkle of granola and some almond milk for the end of the day or "dessert" but not sure if I will end up eating it or not today. I don't typically like to keep my calories under 1,000 because it leads to binge eating for me.
Other than that, nothing more to report. Going to drop the one math class I was taking because it doesn't count towards my degree (found that out late) and they are allowing drops due to the coronavirus. My brain just isn't functioning with the stress of the lockdown.
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Posted 02 April 2020 - 06:58 PM
SW: 127.6
#8
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Posted 03 April 2020 - 12:18 PM
Woke up today even higher in weight, 126.8. I'm praying this is due to bloating and period gain.
I'm usually not very hungry during this time so I haven't eaten yet even though it is noon. Still contemplating what I actually want to eat. I vacillate between wanting to eat the healthiest thing with the most nutrients (which can sometimes be higher in cals) to wanting to eat something that tastes phenomenal because I want to use my calories in a satisfying way. I probably should just do a mix of the two. I will probably end up eating the leftover breakfast from yesterday as it is heavy in protein and I definitely need that.
I want to get to a place where I can take some body check photos and also post photos of my food, I'm just so irritated I can't post image.farm photos here. I'm on EDC and it is so easy to post from there.
#9
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Posted 03 April 2020 - 07:02 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: 126.8 (+.7)
GW: 120
Breakfast: skipped
Lunch: tofu scramble with potatoes, black beans and tomatoes
Dinner: brown rice with tofu and mustard green stir-fry + curried peanut sauce
So I never skip meals (or haven't in a long time) but I woke up this morning at a higher weight and felt blah. I know it is most likely period bloat but I still hate seeing it. I woke up late and ended up having to venture out to grab groceries, it was the first time I have been out to any store since the lockdown. I was able to pick up some almond milk and some of my everything bagels, so that was nice.
If I had to guess I would say I'm around 600-700 cals right now for the day (maybe 800???) so I figure I will end up having something else later tonight. I sometimes eat bran flakes with a little granola and almond milk as a treat (I think I mentioned it before) so that would be a solid 300 calories to boost my daily total. I know I probably sound stupid--why eat more when I want to lose? I just know my mental health tanks when I restrict too low and I almost always have a binge followed by a purge and I really, REALLY don't want to go down that road again. I would rather eat a little more and lose slower than go back to life binging and purging.
I'm going to get off my ass and take bodycheck photos, I swear. I feel like I'm too bloated right now to take any but maybe I will this weekend.
#10
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Posted 04 April 2020 - 05:56 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: 125.8 (-1)
GW: 120
Breakfast: two homemade vegan blueberry bran muffins
Lunch: tofu scramble with potatoes, black beans and tomatoes
Dinner: brown rice with tofu and mustard green stir-fry + curried peanut sauce
I literally have not left the house today at all. It rained all day and our power went out for several hours, so no internet/TV. I read a lot of my current book (The new Sarah J Maas, Crescent City) and deep cleaned my bathroom in the dark.
Weighed in a little less this morning and that felt good. The closer I am to being under 125 the better. If only I could find the energy and/or motivation to exercise.
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Posted 04 April 2020 - 06:23 PM
89vision, on 04 Apr 2020 - 5:56 PM, said:
I literally have not left the house today at all. It rained all day and our power went out for several hours, so no internet/TV. I read a lot of my current book (The new Sarah J Maas, Crescent City) and deep cleaned my bathroom in the dark.
Hi!
I hope you don't mind me following along. I am so jealous that you are reading the new Sarah J Maas book! I have yet to get my hands on it. 
Right now I am reading a very old book, "One for the Money" by Janet Evanovich. The book was released in 1994
Wishing you all the best x
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Posted 04 April 2020 - 06:52 PM
savingsarah, on 04 Apr 2020 - 6:23 PM, said:
Hi!
I hope you don't mind me following along. I am so jealous that you are reading the new Sarah J Maas book! I have yet to get my hands on it.
Right now I am reading a very old book, "One for the Money" by Janet Evanovich. The book was released in 1994
Wishing you all the best x
Hi!! No problem following of course 
Have you checked online libraries for the Maas book? That is what I did!
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#13
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Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:16 PM
SW: 127.6
CW: ???
GW: 120
Breakfast: green smoothie with spinach, banana, frozen mango and soy milk
Lunch: everything bagel with butter and tomatoes
Dinner: sesame udon noodles with tempeh, broccoli, carrots, cabbage and water chestnuts
Didn't weigh this morning.
Woke up today craving a run. I miss getting out and using my body. I have felt so lazy and unmotivated lately. It rained all weekend and today the sun came out, I took a walk with my son and did a small run with him on his scooter. It felt refreshing and I think I'm going to try to do it daily. Nothing big, just a run around the block.
Did well with food today, I made sure to have a smoothie this morning because I'm trying to keep up on my vitamin C and other nutrients. Splurged on a bagel for lunch, I bought two things of bagels so I wouldn't have to go back out to the store and now I'm kind of like...what am I going to do with these??? lmao! I have one pack in the freezer at least. I'm at 1,104 calories for the day (I have been trying not to add in calories here because it can get triggering for me....I may at some point add them) so I will most likely eat something else before the end of the day. I made tapioca pudding with soy milk in these little mini kerr jars and I think I have one left in the fridge, I may just eat that.
Tricks that works to keep your shape ?
#1
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Posted 20 March 2022 - 06:48 PM
Hey there ...
I wanted to start a topic where we could share the things that helps us to stay in shape and healthy and not to put on too much weight.
I don't mean to promote anything that would affect badly our body ... just the sometimes little easy things that helps.
After so many years we probably have good knowledge to share !
As for me :
- Starting the day with green tea.
It helps reduce the hunger and also I guess it kick starts my metabolism on the right track.
- Checking that I drink 2 liters per day.
(usually drinking much means eating less which hopefully means eating prioritizing healthy food first ? ... not always though)
- Of course doing sport
I am usually not hungry after doing sport too for some reasons
It's common knowledge maybe but the green tea I wanted to share it's more efficient than coffee I think in a gentle way
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#2
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Posted 21 March 2022 - 09:20 AM
😂
I agree with staying HYDRATED - drink that water and be proactive about glomming moisturizer on your face too
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I ramble online at Carrots In My Carryon
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Posted 03 April 2022 - 03:29 PM
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#4
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Posted 07 April 2022 - 02:33 AM
Oats in the morning seems to help too I think.
I mean for breakfast or for first meal even if later.
(Idealy I would eat at 11am and 5 or 6 pm...)
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Posted 07 April 2022 - 02:17 PM
Exercise: running, rebounder workouts, strength and conditioning. Where possible on the weekends I also like running in a 'fasted' state.
Also, if I get enough sleep, this makes a big difference to my weight. Less than 7 hours a night and I feel tired and more likely to eat 'fast' food rather than make healthier choices.
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Posted 14 April 2022 - 10:19 AM
sweetdaisy, on 07 Apr 2022 - 2:17 PM, said:
16:8 fasting. First meal at 1pm, last meal at 9pm.
Exercise: running, rebounder workouts, strength and conditioning. Where possible on the weekends I also like running in a 'fasted' state.
Also, if I get enough sleep, this makes a big difference to my weight. Less than 7 hours a night and I feel tired and more likely to eat 'fast' food rather than make healthier choices.
I feel like sleep is often over looked as essential in weight loss....I know when I hit my lw I was sleeping SOOOOO much more than now...
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HT: 5'7
CW: 120 (6/27/21)
LW: 106
HW: 185 
(20 years ago)
SW : 130 
GW1:125 Hit 9/14/13
GW2: 120 Hit 10/4/13
GW3: 115 
Hit 10/19/13
GW4: 110 Hit 11/14/13
GW5: 106 Hit 12/15/13
???GAIN-118-- 3 /6/14
UGW: I'll let you know when I get there
Here we go again...
2015 Start 123...
GW1: 117
09/2/19---135 Haven't been this FAT in YEARS! I'm ashamed to say what my goal weight is.
04/27/21: CW:125
06/27/21 CW:120.2
GW1: 115
GW2: 110
GW3: 105
UGW: ??
#7
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Posted 14 April 2022 - 02:57 PM
BeThinErin, on 14 Apr 2022 - 10:19 AM, said:
I feel like sleep is often over looked as essential in weight loss....I know when I hit my lw I was sleeping SOOOOO much more than now...
Definitely agree. I can sometimes get in a rut where I continually go to bed too late and just end up feeling tired and that's when I make bad food choices.
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Posted 15 April 2022 - 02:46 AM
sweetdaisy, on 14 Apr 2022 - 2:57 PM, said:
Definitely agree. I can sometimes get in a rut where I continually go to bed too late and just end up feeling tired and that's when I make bad food choices.
Yes and yes ... sleeping helps on so many level.
Helps not being too hungry.
Help not feeling exhausted and needing some sugar
also helps because we don't eat when we sleep
But I really think in general it helps have a better balanced chemistry inside our body so fat is probably more balanced too.
(I think it has been said in a more scientific way by real scientist too XD )
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#9
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do you find yourself getting annoyed at teenagers thinking they're way more mature than they are?
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Posted 03 March 2018 - 02:02 PM
cannedpeaches, on 24 Feb 2018 - 08:46 AM, said:
it doesn't really bother me honestly.
or maybe i just haven't noticed.
although i havent heard any teen convos recently.
i will say this:
theyre teens.
theyre getting used to adulthood and
becoming independent of their parents.
and thats a big deal.
so i feel its natural to want to be intimate or
be close to someone as that parental intimacy dissipates.
and maybe its a development thing.
or an experience thing.
i just let them be.
honestly lol i get more annoyed with older people.
like i feel older people can feel more established.
theyve had a job long term, etc.
so idk maybe they feel they know more than someone younger.
thats annoying to me.
cause i mean, i feel like there are younger
people who could teach me a lot.
and actually on this site a lot of them do.
edit:
i dont want to talk about teenagers
like i know what theyre going through.
but i guess i kind of did and i think
that mostly reflects my life.
i dont think anyone ever stops being a teenager.
or stops being a toddler or child or baby.
i mean, im an 'adult' and i cry like a baby.
or go through identity and puberty like a teenager.
and i have to do adult things like make appointments,
pick up my meds, buy food.
im still a child but there is and adult part of me that takes care
of the child me.
This almost read like a poem. Something is very beautiful about it. ❤️
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#22
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Posted 09 March 2018 - 05:31 PM
I'm at that point where I can't stand old or young people. Like teens get mad at me for not taking them seriously when I complain about them complaining about their parents and homework. And this was in an 18+ group. Go away! You don't belong here!
Was anyone else triggered by aging?
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Posted 05 March 2018 - 05:16 PM
So I was okay for awhile. I was more or less picking up the pieces after I left my ex (I still can't believe he told me I was getting fat, you don't SAY that to an EDer, you just don't) (and believe it or not that was only halfway through our relationship). Then... the big 3-0 loomed. And I passed it. And a bunch of other stuff was happening, like graduating with a BA at last and having to decide what came next. Looking around and realizing I wasn't married like I'd hoped to be. This is an even bigger fail for me considering I have at least twice the usual options -- men AND women -- and same-sex marriage is legal here.
Then the weight came on a little more easily than it used to.
I think I've been freaking out partly because this is visible aging. It is just about the only visible part, but there you go. It's still a sign. I've realized I'm older than a lot of the women I'd date, in part because the WLW my age seem to have dogs and partners and houses and jobs already. So much about my ex held me back from growing up. I did it in this big ol' burst of holy-mackerel-lookit-the-world-fly-by.
Here I am, 32, with a belly I can't even undulate in an enticing manner (the single perk of a belly: belly dancing!) and crushes on people who will inevitably turn out to be at least a decade my junior. I'm... really not into men my own age, only older for some reason, but with women for some reason I want to be adorable youthful giggly creatures together when we're not cynical af about the entire world. Boy, dating is going to be interesting when I finally balls-up and try it again.
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PLEASE HELP
#1
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Posted 26 August 2021 - 10:19 AM
Why whenever i plan to eat a certain amount of cals lets say 500 for an example. Im so excited the day before if ive like overeaten for some reason and thinking tmrrow im gonna eat 500 and lose more etc. Then when im supposed to eat 500 i just lose alot of motivation and Dont even stay as like concentrated on eating the amount i have planned to eat instead i just go and snack several times. Like if ive eaten 450 kcal which i planned to eat then i do not stop there i dont even think i just take one bite more and then one bite more and it goes on so i eat like 800 instead and then i feel horrible.???? Why do i always lose track /motivation the day im restricting compared to planning to restrict. How do i have the same ”motivation” like all the time?like should i write some quotes that i can look at when im in my ”i do not care what i eat mode” I totally understand if u dont understand anything of this hahahha my writing is so fkn unclear
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Posted 26 August 2021 - 10:21 AM
you can't have the same motivation all of the time because your body varies depending on the day or even hour.. hormonal fluctuations are one of the biggest causes of this and so much is changing in your body minute by minute. some days I feel fine on 200 calories whereas another day I'll feel like I'm going to pass out and be super hungry on 650 calories. it can also be worse depending on your weight; if you're at a higher weight you need more energy so it's harder to restrict so low. but the lower your weight gets it becomes harder due to different reasons.
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Posted 26 August 2021 - 11:18 AM
kitn, on 26 Aug 2021 - 10:21 AM, said:
you can't have the same motivation all of the time because your body varies depending on the day or even hour.. hormonal fluctuations are one of the biggest causes of this and so much is changing in your body minute by minute. some days I feel fine on 200 calories whereas another day I'll feel like I'm going to pass out and be super hungry on 650 calories. it can also be worse depending on your weight; if you're at a higher weight you need more energy so it's harder to restrict so low. but the lower your weight gets it becomes harder due to different reasons.
this. yesterday I needed extra because I had consumed lower the day before and my body just could not with that yet. so I ate a little extra and felt better in myself -- less crashy, more balanced. and that's the only way I'm going to lose weight, by keeping that balanced feeling. attempting too much too soon is a recipe for failure.
relapse + soda (and mile and a half walks)
#1
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Posted 03 August 2021 - 06:28 PM
I didn't care during COVID but wow do I care now.
goals
walk at least a mile and a half or 35 mins every day
calories under 1300 at the most (ideally more like 1000-1200)
lose the gut, kid, it was cute when you were a chubby teenager but you're a grown woman with not much going for her now. you can always safety-pin your clothes to fit you better.
3 august 2021 -- tuesday
morning weight: 100.6 lb
1/2 box (so, 1 serving) mac and cheese = 280 cals
tried to walk but couldn't make my goal of the town line; too hot. still did 25 minutes brisk-moderate pace.
2/3 small McD's milkshake = 340 cals
approx 1/2 what I affectionately refer to as a sugarbomb but it stops me vomiting on the trail = ???
tried walking again, made my goal: 35 minutes brisk-moderate pace, mile and a half.
if I have those Bagel Bites for dinner like I plan, that's 1020 in food, plus I probably drank 300 = I shouldn't have had that snack, should I. but I need food for meds. let's hope I can offset excess calories with the extra walk I took.
we'll see what tomorrow brings.
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Posted 04 August 2021 - 09:36 AM
4 august 2021 -- wednesday
morning weight: 100.8
well, that showed me.
8 Bagel Bites = 400 calI want to leave room for 300 cals of drinks so... soup tonight, that's only 220.
I know liking your calories liquid is less than awesome but also the taste of cola is one of my favorite in the world. willing to give up milkshakes for the duration but not cola. [sigh] it does mean I can't take daytime walks until the temperatures return to a sensible mid-60s F. dusk walks or nothing. bring on the deet.
~later~
no soup. about 300 cals of mac + cheese. on the other hand, can only possibly consume about 300 of drinks. and yes these are ballparks. the one place my OCD doesn't go, and it ought to.
not only did I walk through a chunk of Walmart, I did another 35 min/1.5 mi tonight. dusk is perfect. deet works.
so total cals should be 1000-1050. love that for meeeeee. and exercise is nice; we'll see if today's walking helped at all. I took bubly on my walk instead of sugarbomb (OJ + grenadine + ginger ale). dusk walking + water > sunlight walking + sugar.
quick 5 august update
hahaaaaa even though I only managed 200 cals of soda, morning weight didn't budge
#3
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Posted 06 August 2021 - 08:25 AM
august 5 2021 -- thursday
morning weight: 100.8
no damage done but no progress.
understand that this comes from a place of deep self-loathing and a sense that I am never going to be good enough, but at least if I can go back to being thin, I will be worth something.
now that Deep Thoughts time is over, what you came for:
300 liquid cals
Bagel Bites 500 cal -- feeling rebellious, hangry, definitely ate my mood there. instant regret in the form of hiccups. am learning to read my body.
walk 1.5mi/this time a little under 35min. didn't feel as awful as the past few days.
220 cals tomato soup -- which is filling like you wouldn't believe
total 1020 cal
someone said "you can't control where you take off and put on weight" and I wanted to shake them by the shoulders and cry because God can't have been this cruel to me, to give me an enormous manly middle and an incredibly feminine personality, and no breasts and hips, God just can't. I'm telling you, if this is true, I'm saving up for autologous fat transfer.
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Posted 06 August 2021 - 09:12 AM
august 6 2021 -- friday
morning weight: a grotesque 101 flat. how?!?!
not planning to walk today (engaged elsewhere at the best time for it) so... rest day, I guess. but I don't think I can restrict below 1000. 900 at best. so fuck it. cheat day. eating my destroyed self-esteem.
#5
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Posted 25 August 2021 - 05:17 PM
august 25 2021 -- wednesday
morning weight: 100.4, noticeably flatter
restricting to 1100: two meals, one and a half sodas at most
on the one hand, there's room in the drink calories category because I'm not planning to have more than the one soda. on the other, I feel super guilty for going 20 cals over the meal allowance today.
it felt so good waking up to a better belly. it felt amazing getting compliments. and now I've had my jeans taken in. I think I'm around 27.5"? I looked so good in those jeans. I think to myself, if I can stop caring about the scale (because the scale is behaving weirdly) and just concentrate on feeling good in my clothes again, maybe this thing won't eat me alive this time. maybe. maybe I can stop at a waist of 27-27.5".
I'm so anxious today.
#6
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Posted 26 August 2021 - 08:49 PM
august 26 2021 -- thursday
morning weight: 100.0, officially 27.5" (down 1.5"), aiming for 27
meal allowance: we are UNDER by 100, total about 920
I'm still in those jeans. it wasn't a dream. and in a measly .3" I can be in the next size down of something I want for Christmas and it will fit perfectly.
I think I can actually win. because I don't want to be emaciated, I want to be comfortable in my skin. will I still feel more at home in pro-anorexia spaces than normal ones? yes. self-control even to high restriction standards only is seen as disordered. I don't count myself even as having OSFED. this is just... where I'm comfortable eating. how I'm comfortable eating. and it's not killing me to cut back a little. or to do two five-minute workouts a day and walk the odd mile and a half. woooo, look how fucking damaged my life is. but try talking about it to anyone outside of these spaces like that. try convincing someone normal that actually 920 calories is a good day, and that you left something on the plate because you were full. people look at you funny.
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Posted 27 August 2021 - 09:20 PM
august 27 2021 - friday
morning weight: 100.4, measuring 27" in the morning, 27.5" in the evening
420+220+210=850 cals for the day
the jeans still fit at my bloated 27.5". so heckit all I'm ordering the something I wanted just so I can have it to wear.
this may be what maintenance looks like??? or it may? not? further experimentation is required. I know I can eat it back on if I drop too low. [eyeroll]
Starving to death?
#3
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Posted 25 January 2019 - 01:46 PM
TBH, that's my goal. but I'm not really very good at starving myself.
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28 year old female
HW: 140lbs. SW: 135 lbs.(BMI: 23.2)
~~~~ H: 5' 4" ~~~~ CW: 131.0 = BMI: 22.5 ~~~~
GW #1: 130 (22.3) GW #2: 126 (21.6) GW #3: 121 (20.8) GW #4: 118 (20.3)
GW #5: 115 (19.7) GW #6: 111 (19.1) GW #7: 107.4 (18.4) GW #8: 103 (17.7)
UGW: 76 lbs. (13.0) LW: 88 lbs.
This disease has tainted my soul.
Follow my accountability thread!
#4
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Posted 25 January 2019 - 01:48 PM
“Be kind to those you love, and be kind to those you don't.”
: EDNOS :
🖤
:Stats:
-----------------
---------
Height: 5'8.75"
Weight: NOT KNOWN CURRENTLY! WILL WEIGH SELF SOON!
GW 1: 170 lbs
GW 2: 160 lbs
GW 3: 150 lbs
GW 4: 135 lbs
GW 5: 125 lbs
GW 6: 120 lbs
---------
UGW: 110 lbs
-----------------
He/They
#5
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Serpent God of Fasting
- LocationHouston, we have a problem
Posted 25 January 2019 - 01:48 PM
If I did that I just wouldn't ever break one of my fasts, no reason to whittle away my entire body in the attempt.
When your mind is not in the right place very dangerous things can result really quickly. This is why I avoid the shower if ever in such a state as collapse in a shower when not eating and distraught is very likely.
The good thing about going very slowly is that you have lots of time to change your mind. The bad thing about it is that anorexia nervosa takes over the mind making it nearly impossible to stop even you want to. You will likely be forced into treatment if anything occurs.
I was once told that you are what you eat and then I just cried and cried and cried cause no matter how much I wanted to be one I just couldn't bring myself to eating a skinny person.
My threads: The Fasting Game My Fasting Game Spreadsheet Youtube Exercise Videos (No-Equipment): Organized into Routines The Whoosh Effect My Profile My Pics
#6
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Sage
Posted 25 January 2019 - 01:52 PM
I haven't, but as suicide methods go I think that would be a good one because you have plenty of time to think about it. A lot of people who survive violent suicide attempts like jumping off buildings report that they regretted it on the way down. Probably a lot of the ones who didn't make it felt the same too, and I feel awful thinking about that - their last thought was 'I want to live' but they couldn't do anything about it.
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If temptation storms, or you fall upon the rocks of tribulation, look to the star: Call upon Mary!
If you are tossed by the waves of pride or ambition, detraction or envy, look to the star, call upon Mary.
If anger or avarice or the desires of the flesh dash against the ship of your soul, turn your eyes to Mary.
If troubled by the enormity of your crimes, ashamed of your guilty conscience, terrified by dread of the judgment,
you begin to sink into the gulf of sadness or the abyss of despair, think of Mary.
In dangers, in anguish, in doubt, think of Mary, call upon Mary. - St. Bernard of Clairvaux
They/them • 42 • Vegan • Doing the 'bodyfat percentage instead of weight' thing
22.5% 22% 21.5% 21% 20.5% 20% 19.5% 19% 18.5% 18% 17.5% 17% 16.5% 16%
I want a body like this... and I have exec dysfunction. Wish me luck!!
#8
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The Real Goddess Ana
- Locationisolating myself from humanity
Posted 25 January 2019 - 02:11 PM
I mean honestly that is what all of us are essentially doing slowly to ourselves whether intentional or not
I have tried to kill myself slowly via starvation though, during my last relapse I really thought thats how I was gonna go out of this world.... but its a slow and painful way to die and if I would of kept going down that road I would of hated how I let myself die slowly in front of everyone who loves me
Height: 5 '6.75
Eating Disorder: Anorexia b/p subtype ( struggling to recover)
HW: 156 repulsive pounds ( bmi of 26 I think)
CW: 74.8 pounds/BMI 11.8
LW :74.8 pounds /bmi 11.8
GW: I don't even know anymore
UGW: RECOVERY AND SELF ACCEPTANCE AND NOT CARING ABOUT MY GOD DAMN WEIGHT ( to an extent of course, I never wanna get overweight)
#10
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Posted 25 January 2019 - 03:35 PM
I have a whole list of better methods I'll try before self-starvation, but I wouldn't care if my ED killed me.
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#11 Guest_Crazy Pixie_*
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Posted 25 January 2019 - 11:16 PM
I'm terrified of the idea of starving to death. That's why I occasionally go through phases of bulimic behavior after restricting for a long time- my sister LOVES talking about how anorexics can "starve themselves to death, get heart attacks etc."
Idk, I've always had this paranoid little thought in my head that if I starved to death, I might have a heart attack while I'm sitting on the toilet, or stark naked in the shower...
i'm more likely to die by violent suicide than anorexia tbh
#12
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Posted 25 January 2019 - 11:36 PM
Yeah, year before last. My calories were mostly alcohol. Sometimes I'd take a bite or two of food. My therapist was trying to get me inpatient; got her wish after a suicide attempt. I eventually got so crazy (literally) from zero calories and alcohol depleting my brain it was about the end for me.
#13
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 12:17 AM
it's always been a really twisted fantasy of mine...
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#14
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 01:34 AM
#15
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 02:18 AM
LoveJoyHopeCourageJustice, on 25 Jan 2019 - 1:52 PM, said:
I haven't, but as suicide methods go I think that would be a good one because you have plenty of time to think about it. A lot of people who survive violent suicide attempts like jumping off buildings report that they regretted it on the way down. Probably a lot of the ones who didn't make it felt the same too, and I feel awful thinking about that - their last thought was 'I want to live' but they couldn't do anything about it.
gods that's terrifying to think about. that's a big reason why i don't want to really try suicide, fear of regret, and a more general fear of death.
#16
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 02:55 AM
It wasn’t on purpose but if I didn’t start binging immediately after being hospitalized I wouldn’t be here anymore
#17
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 04:00 AM
#19 Guest_jackpier666_*
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Posted 26 January 2019 - 04:04 AM
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Eufelchen's Quest to Find Sanity Again (6ft/183 cm, SW 54.4kg, GW 50kg)
#1
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Sage
Posted 22 April 2022 - 02:01 PM
Goals:
- Reduce c/s sessions
- Eat 3 meals per day, at least one of which needs to be cooked
- Reduce steps to 15k
- Get more sleep, go to bed earlier
- Fill evenings with stuff other than c/s and stay away from the kitchen
- Drink 2l per day minimum (tea, mineral water)
Structure:
- Post intake, TDEE, active cals, step count and achievements related to goals stated above
- Weigh-ins daily in the morning
#2
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Sage
Posted 22 April 2022 - 02:13 PM
Intake: 992 cals
C/s: yes
TDEE: 2250
Active cals: 670
Steps: 18.467
Weigh in: -
Feel like crap today. Still sick, my whole body hurts and I somehow got 18k steps in. Fasted most of the day, then again ate too much at night, including some from c/sing. I will not buy any more c/s food though, so I hope I will make it until Monday. Might try to sleep most of the day.
Also, I saw my new GP and got a date for a check up, including blood work. It's in 10 days, so of course I have to drop as much weight as I can until then
Gotta love the ED logic.#3
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Sage
Posted 23 April 2022 - 10:43 AM
Intake: 1230 cals
C/s: no
TDEE: 2220
Active cals: 654
Steps: 19.733 (will surely crack the 20k)
Weigh-in: 54.8 kg, I feel disgusting
What can I say... Failed reducing steps, body still hurts and my weight is a freaking joke. On the positive side: I at least didn't c/s today, though tempted to c/s some ice cream. We'll see. Water intake was good, though, 2.5l so far.
My stomach feels like I swallowed a stone and I look pregnant. I hate this.
UPDATE: C/Sed. Damn it. Intake now ~1400, 20.185 steps, 663 active calories, 3l total hydration and I am going to bed. HR is pretty low again and it hurts a little to pee. Something is not right.
#4
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Posted 24 April 2022 - 11:39 AM
Intake: 1550 cals
C/s: yes
TDEE: 2200
Active cals: 600
Steps: 18.698
Weigh-in: 55 kg, I don't have words anymore.
Another day with too many steps. My legs and lower back hurt. Why can't I keep it under 15k?
Plus side: I discovered the "Hydration" tracking feature of my Garmin app and it suggests the amount I should drink based on my activity. So I had 3l of tea and water today, hope that will make a difference.
Intake-wise I wanted to go lower, but got tempted to c/s some cake I had here, it was delicious. And I really enjoy my oatmeal breakfast. I also only had easily digestible foods today, let's see if that gets things moving. Will try some massaging later.
Gotta work again tomorrow after being on sick leave, not really looking forward to that. My new position starts the week after this and I am a little anxious what to expect...
#5
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Posted 25 April 2022 - 01:45 PM
Intake: +/- 1600 cals
C/s: yes
TDEE: 2150
Active cals: 550
Steps: 18.227
Weigh-in: 54.5 kg, like the trend but I want to see it drop muuuuch more
Bad day. Work stressed me out, I was forgetful as hell and had a massive c/s session. I feel really overwhelmed by life right now and my ED is impacting me a lot, especially the obsession with getting steps in. I even got more than 15k steps in while sick last week. And yet, I am not ready for recovery at all. All I want and all I am thinking about is just dropping weight.
Tomorrow I am not working from home and will go to the office. Plan to fast until lunch and only have liquids for the day (can't avoid lunch with colleagues and will have a soup). And I will not weigh myself.
#6
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Posted 26 April 2022 - 01:09 PM
Intake: 1264 cals
C/s: yes, but not much
TDEE: ~ 2300
Active cals: 690
Steps: 22.230
Weigh-in: 55 kg. I don't even know what to write.
Way too many steps. Went to the office and had lunch with colleagues where I had to get a salad from the salad bar as the soup was leek with cheese, yuk. Also couldn't resist c/sing some ice cream and pita bread. I really need to stop.
Brain fog is getting worse and I am worried I have heart issues. I read up about stasis gastritis caused by heart problems and my symptoms sound a lot like that.
I am still so worried that the weight gain is not just water retention
#7
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Posted 27 April 2022 - 01:26 PM
Intake: 1276 cals
C/s: yes, but just ice cream and I didn't buy any new c/s foods
TDEE: ~ 2500
Active cals: 933
Steps: 23k
Weigh-in: 54.8 kg
Today was actually overall good. I had a good rhythm, got stuff done, wasn't too stressed and not too tempted to c/s during the day, just after dinner. I also had 3.2l of water today, as recommended by my smart watch.
I actually went running again, which is probably not the best idea because I should reduce exercise, but it felt kind of good.
Dinner was a bit too much in terms of volume, but pretty delicious. Used up the rest of the Thai basil and tried a low cal chicken alternative that was quite decent.
If my weight doesn't drop soon and my check up next week doesn't show anything wrong, I might just give up and embrace the 16.x BMI. Maybe focus on strength training and toning up.
Tomorrow is my goodbye lunch with the team. Will just have a salad or, if they have a type I Iike, eat a soup. Though I am super scared of sodium to not make the water retention worse.
#8
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Posted Yesterday, 01:26 PM
Intake: 1390 cals
C/s: yes, ice cream
TDEE: 2600+
Active cals: 1023
Steps: 21k
Weigh-in: 54.4 kg
Good day again, nice deficit. I used my bike for the first time in months and it was fun, plus burned surprisingly many calories. I might do a little tour this weekend.
Going for a run in the evening after I finish work is perfect, I like this new routine. And the weather is great which makes it more fun. Running also really gets things moving in the digestive tract, though my stomach still has this weird knot and sticks out a little.
Hydration went well, too, 3l of water. Plus I really enjoy cooking, though I can't bring myself to make a meal containing more than 300 cals max
C/sing is still an issue, though it is a step forward that I do it less and mostly in the evening. Really craving specific stuff: low cal cookie dough ice cream, tiramisu and a special type of cake. When I buy that stuff I really can't control myself and c/s it all in one big session. But this week I managed to buy less stuff and thus c/s a little less. Baby steps, I guess.
#9
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Sage
Posted Today, 01:09 PM
Intake: 1692 cals
C/s: yes, a bit. Tiramisu is my downfall
TDEE: 2600+
Active cals: 1020
Steps: 25.165
Weigh-in: 54.8 kg
Stressful day, last day in my current role and I have a bit of imposter syndrome for the new job that starts on Monday...
Noticed that c/s is kind of my coping mechanism for stress, probably not the best idea.
Another 1000 cal deficit, though maybe a little less due to sloppy c/s today. The Tiramisu they have at Aldi at the moment is soooo good!
Tomorrow I will try to get out of the house as much as possible. Also I will be super active: 2+ hrs walking the dog and running errands, cycling, running and maybe a strength session at the gym. Plus I will shop for some new clothes for work. No c/s until the evening and none at all on Sunday, that's the plan.
justjulia
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Period Back With Vitamins?
#1
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Advanced Warrior
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Posted 31 August 2020 - 07:06 AM
#2
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Posted 31 August 2020 - 07:16 AM
So you got them back without gaining weight? Which type of vitamins, I'm desperate to try anything atm lol. But anecdotally, I did hear that iron, vit D and magnesium help? But magnesium maybe moreso for those with PCOS rather than FHA (usually if you lost your period from being too thin, it's FHA)
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#3
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Posted 31 August 2020 - 08:07 AM
eli_luc, on 31 Aug 2020 - 07:16 AM, said:
Yeah I got it back without gaining weight, I just took a bunch of biotin and this hair skin and nails gummy? alongside a vitamin I occasionally took for women’s health in a big brown bottle. I’ve been purging and not eating as much as I used to which made me shocked that I got my period back. Then again, I haven’t had it since March :/ maybe my body is just accustoming to my ed lolSo you got them back without gaining weight? Which type of vitamins, I'm desperate to try anything atm lol. But anecdotally, I did hear that iron, vit D and magnesium help? But magnesium maybe moreso for those with PCOS rather than FHA (usually if you lost your period from being too thin, it's FHA)
#4
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Posted 31 August 2020 - 08:12 AM
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Diagnosed EDNOS/OSFED
Height 5'2
SW 212 lbs
LW 127
GW 1 190
GW 2 175
GW 160
GW 150 lbs *new clothes*
GW 140 Lbs
GW 135 lbs *new clothes*
GW 120 lbs *new bikini*
GW 101 lbs *freedom from fat"
UGW 99 lbs
212 211 210 209 208 207 206 205 203 202 201 200 199 198 197 196 195 194 193 192 191 190
189 188 187 186 185 184 183 182 181 180 179178 177 176 175 174 173 172 171 170 169 168
167 166 165 164 163 162 161 160 159 158 157 156 155 154 153 152 151 150 149 148 147 146
145 144 143 142 141 140 139 138 137 136 135 134 133 132 131 130 129 128 127 126 125 124
123 122 121 120 119 118 117 116 115 114 113 112 111 110 109 108 107 106 105 104 103 102
101 100 99
#5
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Posted 31 August 2020 - 12:47 PM
justanotherzombie, on 31 Aug 2020 - 08:12 AM, said:
even if I’m still restricting? this is also the second time I’ve lost my period for such a long amount of time because I relapsed so :/Your loss of period is based on loss of basic nutrients. I lost mine at a BMI of 24 because of how quickly I starved off 70 lbs. So it does make sense that increase nutrients that you chance it comming back.
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going on a trip with friends
#1
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Advanced Warrior
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Posted 05 June 2020 - 10:34 AM
so I'm considering going to a beach house with my friends for a few days, I think I could bring a few metal water bottles and c/s into them if needed and pretend to eat and such and bring my own safe foods, do you think I could continue eating under 300 without them being too suspicious of it? Let me know what other things I could do to prevent from having to eat their food and I probably won't be forced to eat there anyways considering they're my friends and not my parents.
#2
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Curiouser and curiouser
- LocationWonderland
Posted 05 June 2020 - 06:35 PM
How old are you guys? In my experience, my friends made a big deal about me not eating when we were teenagers, but now that I'm in my 20s no one really gives me too much grief about it.
Height 5'1
CW: 105
TDEE 1400
HW: 108 lbs (20.4)
LW: 65 lbs (14.5)
GW 1: 95 (18)
GW 2: 90 (17)
GW 3: 85 (16.1)
UGW: 80 (15.1)
accountability ----- safe foods ----- thinspo thread ----- aesthetic thread
#3
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Posted 05 June 2020 - 06:44 PM
#4
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Posted 05 June 2020 - 06:55 PM
#5
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Posted 05 June 2020 - 07:41 PM
Peatea, on 05 Jun 2020 - 6:55 PM, said:
eh if you're going to a beach house and restricting that low while running around and swimming tbh you'll probably end up fainting. If anything I'd splurge my calories while there in an attempt to look like one of those 'effortlessly skinny girls who can eat anything because they're BLESSED" lmao
This too. I suggest just giving urself a break for those few days and try to eat more. You can still pick safe foods like veggies and salads and maybe baked chicken breast (bc clean eating is in these days hahah I’m pretty sure there are a lot of healthy food options around) and then go back to restricting in home!
#6
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Posted 05 June 2020 - 07:48 PM
Tbh if you're restricting that low, people will notice. You could always try to restrict higher for the time being, I promise you won't gain weight if you eat under your TDEE. It's alright to enjoy yourself every now and then.
ANABELLES 2022 weight loss 365 day goals (130----->80 (hopefully)
Alternative fasting days RESULTS
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#1
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Posted 21 March 2019 - 06:15 PM
Stats (Updated March 2022)
Age: 18
Height: 5’5”
HW: 130 lbs
CW: 126.8 lbs
LW: 108 lbs
UGW: 95 lbs
Goal Weights
125 lbs
120 lbs
115 lbs
110 lbs
105 lbs
100 lbs
95 lbs!!!
#2
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Posted 21 March 2019 - 06:22 PM
3/21/19
Total Intake: 825 cal
The only exercise I did today was going on a 20-30 minute walk with my family.
My stomach hurt all day, and I don’t know if that’s from trying to drink more water than I usually do or if it’s a leftover stomachache from yesterday’s binge. Whatever the reason, it suppressed my appetite so I’m okay with it.
#3
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Posted 23 March 2019 - 03:28 PM
The day started out really good, and then I binged. Total for the day was 2080 calories. So it wasn’t a HUGE binge. (I’ve had days of like 4000 calories.)
I’ll update later for today’s info.
UPDATE
3/23/19
Total Calories: 1300
My mom was going to make ice cream today, but decided to wait until tomorrow. Thank goodness, because now I can plan ahead for it.
#4
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Posted 24 March 2019 - 06:44 PM
Total: 1415 calories
Since I’m at home with my family all day on the weekends and my mom makes food, it’s harder to restrict. Today was still not GREAT, because I’ve successfully stayed below 1000 on weekends before. But my mom made ice cream and I had some of that, and then I had some extra snacks. Still, I had some successes. At Sunday school this morning I turned down a smoothie AND a donut, which was hard to do. Hopefully tomorrow will be better, and then I go back to school on Tuesday.
#5
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Posted 26 March 2019 - 02:24 PM
Today (3/26/19) has been good so far! I’m at like 825 cal so far and I’ll have a cookie at my event I’m going to tonight, and maybe something else when I get home. As long as I don’t binge. I’ll update later.
Update: hahahahahhaah im useless and fat and have no self control and I freaking binged lol
#6
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Posted 31 March 2019 - 03:06 PM
Wednesday 3/27/19
Fast! I technically fasted for 40 hours from Tuesday night to Thursday afternoon, but Wednesday was my full day without eating. It was nice.
Thursday 3/28
992 cal
I ate around 650 and didn’t even feel hungry but for some reason I decided to have a protein bar and some cereal? Ugh. If I could have skipped that it would have been better.
Friday 3/29 and Saturday 3/30 were both binges. I don’t even have an excuse. I was so close to doing well on Saturday, but I kept eating even though I wasn’t freaking hungry. I had an awful food baby and felt sick.
I swear April had better be loads better than March because I’m sick of this binge and restrict cycle. I did so well in Febraury and then lost it.
#7
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Posted 07 April 2019 - 07:14 AM
I’m trying to get back on track today so hopefully things start going better. I’m also taking a gym class now so I have to do weightlifting and running every day so that’s gonna finally speed up my weight loss I hope.
#8
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Posted 08 April 2019 - 01:50 PM
Rules:
I can switch days or borrow calories to make it work with my schedule more, if needed.
I’m also giving myself 2000 “free” calories, to add on to any day. So if I eat 950 calories on a day meant for 900, I subtract 50 from the 2000. If I eat less calories than I need to on a day, I add those to the 2000 (or whatever it is) so they can be used another day.
Wish me luck! I’m hoping to be successful most of the time.
#9
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Posted 09 April 2019 - 09:04 AM
Goal: 900 cal
Intake: 984 cal
Exercise: burned 460 cal
Calories left in my borrowing bank (started with 2000): 1916
#10
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Posted 10 April 2019 - 04:47 AM
Goal: 800 cal
Intake: 940 cal
Burned: 548 cal
Borrowing Bank: 1776
#11
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Posted 11 April 2019 - 01:30 PM
Goal: 900
Intake: 1448
Burned: 240
Borrowing Bank: 1228
So I’m sort of sucking at following the HSGD right now, but I’ve been preventing binges so that’s good. We’re out of school today because of an ice storm and power outage so I have to eat more because my family is around. When I go back to school, though, I’ll hopefully be able to start restricting more.
#12
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Posted 12 April 2019 - 07:59 AM
Goal: 1000
Intake: 1464
Burned: idk
Borrowing Bank: 764
Hopefully soon the number in the borrowing Bank will start going back up lol
#13
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Posted 12 April 2019 - 05:49 PM
Goal: 950
Intake: 1397
Borrowing Bank: 317
I’m sick of having to eat with my family because they expect me to eat meals that are like 500 calories each. Like, that’s their normal. Ugh. For once, I can’t wait to get back to school on Monday and really start restricting again.
#14
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Posted 13 April 2019 - 04:59 PM
Goal: 1100
Intake: 1151
Borrowing Bank: 266
Still hoping to bring those numbers up soon
Anyway, today I had a chance to weigh myself for the first time in months!
I weigh 110 lbs, which means my BMI is 18.3 and I’m officially underweight. Heck yeah.
#15
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Posted 15 April 2019 - 04:51 PM
It’s two rice cakes with smashed up raspberries on top. It’s great for sweets cravings, or for toast cravings honestly. The whole thing is only 65 calories! I only ate about one and a half because I wasn’t very hungry, and I’m going to finish the second one in a little bit.
Update
Goal for 4/15: 900 cal
Intake: 895 cal
Borrowing Bank: 2005 cal
#16
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Posted 18 April 2019 - 04:32 PM
Goal: 800
Intake: 968
4/17
Goal: 900
Intake: 831
Borrowing Bank: 1906
On Wednesday I had Diet Coke for the first time and oh my god I get why y’all drink it. It made me feel full after eating only 600 calories, so I didn’t eat again until the evening. Definitely gonna be a Diet Coke hoe from now on.
I also got these really yummy DoTerra cough drops and I’ve been having one for breakfast the past few days
#17
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Posted 20 April 2019 - 10:18 AM
Goal: 950
Intake: 1100
I had to eat out with my family, so I wasn’t able to restrict as much as I wanted. I’ll be able to make it up though, and I avoided binging!
Borrowing Bank: 1783
#18
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Posted 21 April 2019 - 03:27 PM
Goal: 1100
Intake: 999
Borrowing Bank: 1884
I’ll update later for today’s info, but I got to weigh myself again today and... I lost weight! Obviously weight fluctuates so I’m expecting it to go back up a little, especially since I’ve had to eat a little more today, but I’m 108 lbs.
#19
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Posted 22 April 2019 - 06:12 PM
And today, 4/22 I binged like mad and want to die. I swear I’ve had at least 4000 cal today.
I won’t be home for any mealtimes tomorrow so I’m going to fast, and then I’ll probably be able to fast through Wednesday too. Ugh. Just after I lost more weight, I probably gained it all back.
#20
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Posted 28 April 2019 - 12:54 PM
4/23
Fast, started at 8 pm Monday night (4/22)
4/24
Broke my fast at 8:30 pm...48.5 hours! That’s my longest fast yet. I was going to go to 60 hours, maybe longer, but I wasn’t feeling good. Usually I feel great at the beginning of day two of a fast. (I’ve done a couple 36 ish hour fasts) But this time I was dizzy right away when I woke up on day two, and it just kept getting worse. So I had 485 (I think?) calories then went to bed.
4/25
900 cal or something
4/26, 4/27, and today 4/28 all binge days. Ughhh. It always happens after I fast and I thought I was doing good and wouldn’t let it happen this time. If I could have made it through Friday without binging then the weekend would have been fine but nooooo I frickin lost control every day. I need to stop. Starting Monday (tomorrow) I’m done with this binging bullshit.
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Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
#1
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Warrior
Posted 08 October 2019 - 09:27 PM
Just curious if anyone does this. Seems pretty easy since fasting isn’t hard for me at all.
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Advanced Warrior
Posted 08 October 2019 - 09:39 PM
Yes, and I lost 58 p
Quote
ounds that way.
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Posted 09 October 2019 - 11:58 AM
ashinthislife, on 09 Oct 2019 - 11:10 AM, said:
Wow that’s not long at all. What are your stats?
5'7 when I lost all the weight, I started out at 192lbs
Right now, after about a year, I am back at 165lbs and I am ready to make it lower. Wanna join me?
I did not do the raw food thing, but I ate very specific things. I had a very strict budget, as I am also a mom of two and a full time student.
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Posted 09 October 2019 - 02:31 PM
FatNewlywed, on 09 Oct 2019 - 11:58 AM, said:
5'7 when I lost all the weight, I started out at 192lbs
Right now, after about a year, I am back at 165lbs and I am ready to make it lower. Wanna join me?
I did not do the raw food thing, but I ate very specific things. I had a very strict budget, as I am also a mom of two and a full time student.
Yes! I’m 5’8” and 155ish right now so we are really close to the same size!
Today is my eating day. So far I’ve had an apple, a cutie and a cup of vegan butternut squash soup. (90cals) so for dinner later I’ll probably do a salad with no dressing and some grapes or bananas. Haven’t decided yet. If you want you can pm me! I’ll give you my number and we can text. I’m also a mom:) my daughter will be 5 this month and I gonna back to school next year (took a serious break due to health issues)
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Posted 12 October 2019 - 09:42 AM
ashinthislife, on 09 Oct 2019 - 2:31 PM, said:
Yes! I’m 5’8” and 155ish right now so we are really close to the same size!
Today is my eating day. So far I’ve had an apple, a cutie and a cup of vegan butternut squash soup. (90cals) so for dinner later I’ll probably do a salad with no dressing and some grapes or bananas. Haven’t decided yet. If you want you can pm me! I’ll give you my number and we can text. I’m also a mom:) my daughter will be 5 this month and I gonna back to school next year (took a serious break due to health issues)
I am back in school, as well, and a mom to two kids. I am also in my late 30s, so I don't lose easily, anyway.
That said, because I have been overdoing it recently- long enough to be used to overeating again- I am attempting to restrict, lower each day, for about three days or so, until it can be easier to fast. Would you like to do it that way, or just jump right in?
Today, so far, I have had:
1 cup of coffee (5 cals) with zero cal, sugar free syrup and 2 tbsp of half and half (40cals)
1 serving strawberries (50 cals) and 1 oz blueberries (16 cals)
Total cals morning snack: 111 cals
Half toasted sourdough English muffin (70 cals) spread with 1 Laughing Cow wedge (35 cals), topped with 1 poached egg (73 cals)
1 roma tomato (25 cals)
1 serving cucumber (5 cals)
Total: 329 cals
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Posted 12 October 2019 - 12:18 PM
FatNewlywed, on 12 Oct 2019 - 09:42 AM, said:
I am back in school, as well, and a mom to two kids. I am also in my late 30s, so I don't lose easily, anyway.
That said, because I have been overdoing it recently- long enough to be used to overeating again- I am attempting to restrict, lower each day, for about three days or so, until it can be easier to fast. Would you like to do it that way, or just jump right in?
Today, so far, I have had:
1 cup of coffee (5 cals) with zero cal, sugar free syrup and 2 tbsp of half and half (40cals)
1 serving strawberries (50 cals) and 1 oz blueberries (16 cals)
Total cals morning snack: 111 cals
Half toasted sourdough English muffin (70 cals) spread with 1 Laughing Cow wedge (35 cals), topped with 1 poached egg (73 cals)
1 roma tomato (25 cals)
1 serving cucumber (5 cals)
Total: 329 cals
Yeah! I’ve been raw ever since my fast. Yesterday I had two bananas. But I really didn’t have much time to eat. I’m about to do a smoothie or coconut water and 4 bananas with vegan protein powder before work
#11
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Posted 12 October 2019 - 01:07 PM
ashinthislife, on 12 Oct 2019 - 12:18 PM, said:
Yeah! I’ve been raw ever since my fast. Yesterday I had two bananas. But I really didn’t have much time to eat. I’m about to do a smoothie or coconut water and 4 bananas with vegan protein powder before work
Are you vegan typically? If not, I usually keep Campbell's Soup at Hand in my car- the chicken and stars has 60 cals for the entire container, and it is in a drinkable cup. It makes for easy on the run restriction, especially if you get hungry near fast food.
Daily food journal. (Raw vegan)
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Posted 14 October 2019 - 12:51 AM
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Posted 14 October 2019 - 12:55 AM
be careful with all that fasting, it might backfire
also good luck, i hope you return to veganism safely and healthily (:
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Posted 14 October 2019 - 05:25 PM
ashinthislife's Content
There have been 108 items by ashinthislife (Search limited from 29-April 21)
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#69296677Daily food journal. (Raw vegan)
Posted by on 15 October 2019 - 03:11 AM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
Sweet potato
Baked potato with oil free Italian dressing
Iceberg lettuce
#69293449Daily food journal. (Raw vegan)
Posted by on 14 October 2019 - 05:25 PM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
#69286847Daily food journal. (Raw vegan)
Posted by on 14 October 2019 - 12:51 AM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
#69273567Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 12 October 2019 - 12:18 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
FatNewlywed, on 12 Oct 2019 - 09:42 AM, said:
I am back in school, as well, and a mom to two kids. I am also in my late 30s, so I don't lose easily, anyway.
That said, because I have been overdoing it recently- long enough to be used to overeating again- I am attempting to restrict, lower each day, for about three days or so, until it can be easier to fast. Would you like to do it that way, or just jump right in?
Today, so far, I have had:
1 cup of coffee (5 cals) with zero cal, sugar free syrup and 2 tbsp of half and half (40cals)
1 serving strawberries (50 cals) and 1 oz blueberries (16 cals)
Total cals morning snack: 111 cals
Half toasted sourdough English muffin (70 cals) spread with 1 Laughing Cow wedge (35 cals), topped with 1 poached egg (73 cals)
1 roma tomato (25 cals)
1 serving cucumber (5 cals)
Total: 329 cals
Yeah! I’ve been raw ever since my fast. Yesterday I had two bananas. But I really didn’t have much time to eat. I’m about to do a smoothie or coconut water and 4 bananas with vegan protein powder before work
#69273487Thinking About Doing Banana Island
Posted by on 12 October 2019 - 12:14 PM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
#69273429Thinking About Doing Banana Island
Posted by on 12 October 2019 - 12:12 PM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
#69266493riding hurts a lot?
Posted by on 11 October 2019 - 01:49 PM in Sex and Relationships
#69260737Post pictures of your vegan meals
Posted by on 10 October 2019 - 10:08 PM in Vegetarian/Vegan/Raw Food Diets
subtle, on 09 Jun 2016 - 3:55 PM, said:
Dinner for two. Sautéed kale, onion, beet greens, bell pepper, sweet potato with tofutti sour cream. Broccoli "noodles" (they were okay), pinto bean meatballs, roasted beets, and some avocado (on toast for him). About 300kcal, couldn't finish it.
Can I have the recipe for the creme brûlée?
#69260711riding hurts a lot?
Posted by on 10 October 2019 - 10:04 PM in Sex and Relationships
#69256765My husband told me I was fat.
Posted by on 10 October 2019 - 12:36 PM in Sex and Relationships
Miamon, on 10 Oct 2019 - 08:43 AM, said:
Uh oh, I’m also 5’8” and 165 lbs... guess I would disgust him :/
We aren’t even fat!! What he said is ridiculous but with an eating disorder or course to ourselves we are fat. I’m down to 155 right now. Spent the last week fasting one day raw vegan (cause I’m a raw vegan) and now another week fasting. My weight gain was caused by eating animal products again so now I’m back to raw vegan and I feel much better especially with fasting. My normal weight is usually 120. But I’m really trying to go for 105 this time.
#69256761My husband told me I was fat.
Posted by on 10 October 2019 - 12:36 PM in Sex and Relationships
Miamon, on 10 Oct 2019 - 08:43 AM, said:
Uh oh, I’m also 5’8” and 165 lbs... guess I would disgust him :/
We aren’t even fat!! What he said is ridiculous but with an eating disorder or course to ourselves we are fat. I’m down to 155 right now. Spent the last week fasting one day raw vegan (cause I’m a raw vegan) and now another week fasting. My weight gain was caused by eating animal products again so now I’m back to raw vegan and I feel much better especially with fasting. My normal weight is usually 120. But I’m really trying to go for 105 this time.
#6925596521 day water fast
Posted by on 10 October 2019 - 10:52 AM in Fasting and Cleansing
Half an apple
2 cuties
4 grapes
3 bananas
Cup of soup
Cals: 520
Fasting again today.
#69248549Getting dizzy while driving on a fast
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 04:31 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
rarity, on 09 Oct 2019 - 3:43 PM, said:
Thanks, you are too! I know how hard it can be but your daughter sounds like a good reason to make those difficult choices. For me, it's my baby rats. Sure if something happened to me my roommate would take care of them but they would be so confused about where I went and why they aren't getting proper snoot boops anymore lol
I love rats! We have like a tons running amuck in the walls in our house lol obviously not pets. There was a huge bird in my living room the other day. And I found a squirrel inside last week lol. My house is dark and big and very Adams family like. Critters everywhere haha
#6924742121 day water fast
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 02:33 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
Half an apple
A cutie
Cup of soup (vegan and 90cals)
#69247409Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 02:31 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
FatNewlywed, on 09 Oct 2019 - 11:58 AM, said:
5'7 when I lost all the weight, I started out at 192lbs
Right now, after about a year, I am back at 165lbs and I am ready to make it lower. Wanna join me?
I did not do the raw food thing, but I ate very specific things. I had a very strict budget, as I am also a mom of two and a full time student.
Yes! I’m 5’8” and 155ish right now so we are really close to the same size!
Today is my eating day. So far I’ve had an apple, a cutie and a cup of vegan butternut squash soup. (90cals) so for dinner later I’ll probably do a salad with no dressing and some grapes or bananas. Haven’t decided yet. If you want you can pm me! I’ll give you my number and we can text. I’m also a mom:) my daughter will be 5 this month and I gonna back to school next year (took a serious break due to health issues)
#69245587Post pics of your groceries (ortho edition)
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 11:54 AM in Orthorexia
#69245237Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 11:10 AM in Fasting and Cleansing
FatNewlywed, on 09 Oct 2019 - 06:50 AM, said:
Three months. I am starting back again today
Wow that’s not long at all. What are your stats?
#69245233Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 11:09 AM in Fasting and Cleansing
FatNewlywed, on 09 Oct 2019 - 06:50 AM, said:
Three months. I am starting back again today
Wow that’s not long at all. What are your stats?
#69245215Getting dizzy while driving on a fast
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 11:07 AM in Fasting and Cleansing
rarity, on 09 Oct 2019 - 04:48 AM, said:
I just wanted to say thanks for taking care of yourself and the people around you in this way. I have the same issue and force myself to drink some higher calorie liquid before driving as well. The way I figure, if I want to starve myself to death, that's my business but the person I potentially run over may be enjoying their life and want to continue it. Anyway, good luck and be safe.
You’re so sweet ❤️
Yeah I can’t do it to my daughter. I have to do my best to stay healthy for her. It’s not easy though. I don’t even want to eat today:/ I have to push myself though.
#6924235940 day fast/ transformation
Posted by on 09 October 2019 - 03:35 AM in Fasting and Cleansing
#6924096121 day water fast
Posted by on 08 October 2019 - 10:36 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
#69240889Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 08 October 2019 - 10:11 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
FatNewlywed, on 08 Oct 2019 - 9:39 PM, said:
Yes, and I lost 58 p
ounds that way.
That’s awesome!! How long did you do it for?
#69240649Fasting 3 days, eat raw foods and then repeat?
Posted by on 08 October 2019 - 09:27 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
Just curious if anyone does this. Seems pretty easy since fasting isn’t hard for me at all.
#6924061121 day water fast
Posted by on 08 October 2019 - 09:21 PM in Fasting and Cleansing
#69238953Your age and how many sexual partners you've had?
Posted by on 08 October 2019 - 05:42 PM in Sex and Relationships
mandyisnotskinny, on 25 Sept 2019 - 10:30 PM, said:
24. 150, roughly?
No judgment here. Just wondering how! I don’t even know that many people lol but my best friend has been with around 300 guys and that’s cause she lived in a city and is almost 30 now. Her and I are totally different when it comes to sex but have a mutual respect and I love hearing her stories. Like one time was in An elevator. I was jealous about that one. I’m determined to do that with my husband now lol
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Proana tags on tiktok
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Posted 05 March 2022 - 10:02 PM
I am trying to get more thinspo and proana shit on my tiktok but I don't know what to look for because everything is shadow banned
Diagnosed EDNOS/OSFED
Height 5'2
SW 212 lbs
LW 127
GW 1 190
GW 2 175
GW 160
GW 150 lbs *new clothes*
GW 140 Lbs
GW 135 lbs *new clothes*
GW 120 lbs *new bikini*
GW 101 lbs *freedom from fat"
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Posted 25 April 2022 - 05:45 AM
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Posted Today, 02:03 PM
Give~me~wings, on 05 Mar 2022 - 10:02 PM, said:
I am trying to get more thinspo and proana shit on my tiktok but I don't know what to look for because everything is shadow banned
thinnier, on 20 Mar 2022 - 9:54 PM, said:
honestly i just look up model pictures lol so triggering
enevin, on 25 Apr 2022 - 05:45 AM, said:
i wanna know too. rn i just interact with videos so a bunch pop up on my fyp but most of them don’t even have tags
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
pro-ana stuff is typically temporary and hard to find but you can get ur tiktok fyp to be filled with mostly thinspo and such. a good way is to start off with liking and interecting with weight loss themed stuff, and also liking interacting and following accounts of skinny people who's videos are typically them showing off their thinness lol - some accounts like this are filmqueefer, renneebellerive, quincymood, b4byh0e
H: 5'7.5 LW: 150 (2014) SW: 158 (2014) HW: 216 (Dec. 2019..that's embarrassing) CW: ?
Gw 1: 190 lbs (86 kg) BMI - 29.3
Gw 2: 180 lbs (82 kg) BMI - 27.8
Gw 3: 170 lbs (77 kg) BMI - 26.2
Gw 4: 160 lbs (73 kg) BMI - 24.7
Gw 5: 150 lbs (68 kg) BMI - 23.1
Gw 6: 140 lbs (64 kg) BMI - 21.6
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