BrilletA's accountability 
CBMI 14.7
#1 
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 08 March 2021 - 07:15 AM
I don't have a weight goal atm... I mean I have but if I go any lower I can lose my therapist so I try to convince myself to maintain. We'll see how it goes.
My dad just bought me a stationary bike and I'm going to try to focus on my fitness level (which is not good so don't judge me lol) rather than weightloss (easier said than done ofc).
Current stats:
Height: 158 cm
Weight: 87.8 lbs
BMI: 15.9
Measurements:
Waist: 55.5 cm or 21.85 in
Hips: 81 cm or 31.9 in
Bicep: 21 cm or 8.3 in
Bicep (relaxed): 19.5 cm or 7.7 in
Thighs: 42 cm or 16.53 in
I'm going to share how much I work out but if it comes to food I'll post the amount of calories I eat each day. I probably won't talk too much about food or take pics of everything I eat because it's just too repetitive.
Body checks:
08/03/2021
#2
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 08 March 2021 - 11:40 PM
08/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 23.3 km - 543 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 14 cals
Arm exercises: 14 min - 60 cals
Intake: 904 cals
Not that I believe what my watch says about the amount of calories I burn but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Weight: maintained
#3
- Validating
- 4983 posts
Omniscient
- LocationMontreal, Canada
Posted 09 March 2021 - 07:02 AM
Envoyé de mon iPhone en utilisant Tapatalk
My name is Bo
I am a happy monster
I will be rich one day
Money=security+freedom
My acccountability 🖤🖤🖤
https://www.myproana...ntability-an-bp
#4
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
#5
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 10 March 2021 - 03:19 AM
09/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 25 km - 383 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 15 cals
Arm exercises: 10 min - 60 cals
Intake: 943 cals
I almost passed out in the shop today. Hopefully that's because I'm increasing the dose of mianserin and nothing bad is happening.
Weight: maintained
- Alice_in_Wonderland99 likes this
- Like This
#6
- Accountability access
- 4998 posts
Omniscient
- LocationU.K.
Posted 10 March 2021 - 03:45 AM
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
- Poison Pixie 666 and BrilletA like this
- Like This
#7
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 11 March 2021 - 11:22 PM
KittenPurrincess, on 10 Mar 2021 - 03:45 AM, said:
Hey girl, long time no talk ♡ first of all i think you look so drop dead gorgeous ☆☆☆ Second of all please if you're feeling faint perhaps Spread out your calories to have something small before you're having to go out, or drink a tiny bit of low sugar juice ♡ wouldn't want you to pass out and hurt yourself ♡♡♡ anyway hope you're doing alright, have a lovely day xx
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
Hi! You're so sweet, thank you! <3 Actually I ate a small snack before going out so it was a surprise that my body acted this way. BUT! Rn I really think it's because of my meds as I started increasing the dose of mianserin and it can lower blood pressure. I felt really bad (physically) two days ago and I had a BP 77/45. Yesterday after taking less mianserin I was feeling a lot better!
Have a nice day too, honey! <3
- KittenPurrincess likes this
- Like This
#8
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 11 March 2021 - 11:23 PM
10/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 25.4 km - 421 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 13 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Intake: 900 cals
Weight: 87.4 lbs
- n0thingleft0fme likes this
- Like This
#9
- Accountability access
- 4998 posts
Omniscient
- LocationU.K.
Posted 11 March 2021 - 11:32 PM
BrilletA, on 11 Mar 2021 - 11:22 PM, said:
Hope your body gets used to your new meds soon then, it's always the worst when you first start it and it throws your whole body out of whack ♡♡Hi! You're so sweet, thank you! <3 Actually I ate a small snack before going out so it was a surprise that my body acted this way. BUT! Rn I really think it's because of my meds as I started increasing the dose of mianserin and it can lower blood pressure. I felt really bad (physically) two days ago and I had a BP 77/45. Yesterday after taking less mianserin I was feeling a lot better!
Have a nice day too, honey! <3
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
#10
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 11 March 2021 - 11:35 PM
11/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 26.2 km - 536 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 27 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Intake: 959 cals
Weight: -
My therapist told me today to weigh myself again on Tuesday and if I lose another 100g she's going to call my dad and she will be able to do this without my permission as I'm a danger to myself at this point. She wants to put me in the hospital if I continue losing. I'm scared. I don't want to be hospitalized but I'm also scared of maintaining. I feel the need to lose more weight and I don't know if I can fight with my ED anymore. I increased the amount of calories, plateaued for two weeks and it took me a lot of strenght. I don't feel like I can win even if it means going to the hospital if I lose. My body is not losing weight consistently so deep down I hope I plateau this week but at the same time even thinking of it makes me want to die.
- n0thingleft0fme likes this
- Like This
i wish i look like that!#12
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 15 March 2021 - 02:11 AM
KittenPurrincess, on 11 Mar 2021 - 11:32 PM, said:
Thank youHope your body gets used to your new meds soon then, it's always the worst when you first start it and it throws your whole body out of whack ♡♡
Yeah, first days are the worst#13
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
#14
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 15 March 2021 - 02:30 AM
Updates:
12/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 26.7 km - 613 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 22 cals
Arm exercises: 18 min - 60 cals
Intake: 904 cals
Weight: -
13/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 40 min - 15.8 km - 282 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 22 cals
Intake: 1286 cals
Weight: -
14/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 27 km - 469 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 11 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Intake: 1286 cals
Weight: -
- n0thingleft0fme likes this
- Like This
#15
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 15 March 2021 - 02:41 AM
Summary of the last week:
I might tell my dad about what's going on (that I can't stop restricting and I'm at risk of losing my therapist/being hospitalised if I lose more weight) because he sees that something is wrong and he's very worried. I would have to tell him either way becasue if I lose weight, my therapist's going to call him and I'd rather let him know about it. It will be hard. He knows I have an ED but he doesn't even know that I have a scale. He thinks I'm working on not losing which is not true at all. I'm so scared of weighing myself tomorrow.
- n0thingleft0fme likes this
- Like This
#16
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 16 March 2021 - 02:49 AM
15/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 40 min - 17.5 km - 313 cals
Stretches: 8 min - 19 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Walking: 20 mins - 36 cals
Intake: 904 cals
Weight: -
#17
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 17 March 2021 - 02:15 AM
16/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 27.1 km - 496 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 10 cals
Arm exercises: 20 min - 60 cals
Intake: 954 cals
Weight: maintained
I'm both relieved and disappointed that I haven't lost anything. Relieved because I'm not gonna be hospitalized but I'd like to weigh less so I'm mad at myself for maintaining.
I've been feeling really low lately. I wasn't able to do much for my classes and it makes me feel even worse. I'm on a sick leave so I could just let go and rest but I can't. I'm constantly worried about failing. But at the same time I can only think about food/weight/calories. I'm so sick of living like this. Sometimes I think that maybe being hospitalized wouldn't be so bad at this point but then I think about the weight gain and I immediately regret having these thoughts. I'm supposed to start residential treatment in a few months and I was super excited about it but now I feel like there is no point in going there becasue I won't be able to handle gaining all of this weight I worked so hard to lose.
Sorry for being so negative, I just don't feel okay rn.
#18
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 18 March 2021 - 02:37 AM
17/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 28 km - 458 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 17 cals
Arm exercises: 18 min - 60 cals
Walking: 47 min - 2,96 km - 83 cals
Intake: 901 cals
Weight: maintained
#19
- Accountability access
- 2999 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 22 March 2021 - 02:46 AM
Updates:
18/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 28.3 km - 541 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 8 cals
Arm exercises: 20 min - 60 cals
Walking: 50 min - 5.14 km - 100 cals
Intake: 945 cals
Weight: -
19/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 28.7 km - 469 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 3 cals
Arm exercises: 17 min - 60 cals
Intake: 902 cals
Weight: -
20/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 40 min - 27.1 km - 367 cals
Stretches: 20 min - 31 cals
Intake: 1280 cals
Weight: -
21/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.1 km - 446 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 22 cals
Arm exercises: 21 min - 60 cals
Intake: 1284 cals
Weight: -
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 26 March 2021 - 01:11 AM
Updates:
22/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.3 km - 486 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 30 cals
Arm exercises: 17 min - 60 cals
Walking: 30 min - 1.86 km - 54 cals
Intake: 902 cals
Weight: -
23/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.5 km - 520 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 12 cals
Arm exercises: 13 min - 60 cals
Walking: 30 min - 1.54 km - 48 cals
Intake: 954 cals
Weight: 86.8 lbs
24/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 32.3 km - 474 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 24 cals
Arm exercises: 17 min - 60 cals
Intake: 931 cals
Weight: -
25/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 31 km - 447 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 12 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Intake: 959 cals
Weight: 86.8 lbs
I've lost weight so my therapist said that we can't continue to see each other. I have to gain to BMI 16 in two weeks if I want to have sessions again but since I'm lookig for help in residential treatment facilities I'm not forced to go IP.
#22
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 26 March 2021 - 01:40 AM
BMI 15.8
- 𝓐𝓷𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓼𝓲𝓪, Need.to.be.skinny and Boylimia like this
- Like This
#23
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 28 March 2021 - 04:05 AM
26/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.4 km - 421 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 15 cals
Arm exercises: 9 min - 60 cals
Intake: 930 cals
Weight: -
27/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.6 km - 472 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 22 cals
Intake: 1277 cals
Weight: -
I have cravings for chocolate so bad rn haha. But I'm too scared to eat it because I'm afraid of eating anything that doesn't have any nutritional value. But yeah staving myself is so healthy lol
#25
- Accountability access
- 4998 posts
Omniscient
- LocationU.K.
Posted 28 March 2021 - 05:36 AM
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
#26
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 30 March 2021 - 05:40 AM
KittenPurrincess, on 28 Mar 2021 - 05:36 AM, said:
You carry your weight so well, at the same bmi I look like a piglet lmao. Sorry to hear about the doctors being on your case, but at the same time I can't deny they are rightfully worried for you ♡ you have leeway to gain up to the goal they set you, but I understand the obviously disordered mentality of being scared to go above current weight. Sending hugs ♡
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
Whaaaat? No, you look tiny!
I mean, I want to get better but I won't even try to gain, not at home. Even maintaining is so scary. I know I will have to put on weight in residential and it's still going to be hard but I'll have a support there
Thank you for always being so kind <3 <3
- KittenPurrincess likes this
- Like This
#27
- Accountability access
- 4998 posts
Omniscient
- LocationU.K.
Posted 30 March 2021 - 10:57 AM
BrilletA, on 30 Mar 2021 - 05:40 AM, said:
Well in any case I'm rooting for you and your health and happiness ☆☆☆Whaaaat? No, you look tiny!
I mean, I want to get better but I won't even try to gain, not at home. Even maintaining is so scary. I know I will have to put on weight in residential and it's still going to be hard but I'll have a support there
Thank you for always being so kind <3 <3
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
#28
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 30 March 2021 - 11:46 PM
KittenPurrincess, on 30 Mar 2021 - 10:57 AM, said:
Well in any case I'm rooting for you and your health and happiness ☆☆☆
♡I'm Legendary, all Legs, no Dairy, and this is My Diary♡
Tysm <3 I hope you'll be able to have a happy life without this disorder one day. You deserve this <3
- KittenPurrincess likes this
- Like This
#29
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 30 March 2021 - 11:48 PM
28/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.6 km - 480 cals
Stretches: 10 min - 23 cals
Arm exercises: 15 min - 60 cals
Walking: 30 min - 1.84 - 52 cals
Intake: 1284 cals
Weight: -
Weekly summary:
#30
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 30 March 2021 - 11:55 PM
29/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 50 min - 26.8 km - 476 cals
Stretches and yoga: 27 min - 23 cals
Arm exercises: 14 min - 60 cals
Walking: 30 min - 2.39 km - 65 cals
Intake: 986 cals
Weight: -
30/03/2021
Exercises:
Stationary bike: 60 min - 32 km - 517 cals
Stretches : 10 min - 21 cals
Arm exercises: 18 min - 60 cals
Walking: 30 min - 1.3 km - 43 cals
Intake: 952 cals
Weight: 85 lbs
#31
- Accountability access
- 1206 posts
Sage
- LocationPerth, Australia
Posted 06 April 2021 - 03:22 PM
Please please stay safe! You are beautiful and so worthy of happiness! Xxxx
#32
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 12 April 2021 - 08:41 AM
NewDart, on 06 Apr 2021 - 3:22 PM, said:
I'm so sorry I've never checked out your thread even though I always see you like posts on mine! Girl your body is so freaking amazing! I do worry a bit about your exercise level at your low BMI. Honestly by that BMI I could barely get off the couch or leave the house (and still can't), so seeing you push your fragile little body so hard scares me a little
Please please stay safe! You are beautiful and so worthy of happiness! Xxxx
Oh, don't feel obligated to check my thread! But it's so kind of you that you wanted to visit my accountability
Thank you so much for your kind words! I've realised that I can't do this anymore because my body and mind are so so tired and I've admitted myself to the hospital last night. I knew I wouldn't be able to eat more or stop pushing myself to exercise without help. Part of me already regrets this decision haha
#33
- Accountability access
- 1206 posts
Sage
- LocationPerth, Australia
Posted 12 April 2021 - 01:51 PM
BrilletA, on 12 Apr 2021 - 08:41 AM, said:
Oh, don't feel obligated to check my thread! But it's so kind of you that you wanted to visit my accountability
Thank you so much for your kind words! I've realised that I can't do this anymore because my body and mind are so so tired and I've admitted myself to the hospital last night. I knew I wouldn't be able to eat more or stop pushing myself to exercise without help. Part of me already regrets this decision haha
Girl I am so proud and you are so strong! Hospital can be so so fkn scary, and we always want to run away as soon as we've taken the step to go in. But at least for now it will be good for your body, and it won't be forever just a little while. Just until you're out of the danger zone.
Again I'm so proud of you for listening to your body and hearing it say "I need recovery time", that is one of the strongest fucking things any one of us can do. You are a champion.
Stay strong and brave, you got this and I'm here for you xxx
#34
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 22 April 2021 - 08:14 PM
NewDart, on 12 Apr 2021 - 1:51 PM, said:
I'm happy I was able to go to the hospital. I feel much stronger physically and mentally. It was hard not knowing the exact amount of cals that I've been eating but I made it!Girl I am so proud and you are so strong! Hospital can be so so fkn scary, and we always want to run away as soon as we've taken the step to go in. But at least for now it will be good for your body, and it won't be forever just a little while. Just until you're out of the danger zone.
Again I'm so proud of you for listening to your body and hearing it say "I need recovery time", that is one of the strongest fucking things any one of us can do. You are a champion.
Stay strong and brave, you got this and I'm here for you xxx
Thank you so much!
#35
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 22 April 2021 - 08:27 PM
CBMI: 14.9
Weight: 82 lbs
I don't know how I feel about my recent weightloss because I'm glad it's lower but I know it's becoming more and more dangerous every day. I wanna cry because I'm scared they're gonna make me stay in the hospital (I'm supposed to be discharged today) and in Poland if your BMI is lower than 15 you can be hospitalized against your will.
But I'm also glad that the number on a scale was lower than it was two days ago
I will post my step count and stuff as soon as I get home
- brokenhearted1, Feengirl and NewDart like this
- Like This
#36
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 23 April 2021 - 10:58 PM
Updates because before IP I was too depressed to do anything other than workout
29th March - 11th April:
12th April- 23rd April
I was supposed to go residential two weeks ago but they called me and said that because of pandemic they had to cancell admissions for a couple of weeks. I was already barely surviving so I decided to go IP because otherwise I would try to kill myself. I've spend there almost two weeks. While IP I've had to sign a contract for patients with EDs. I wasn't allowed to exercise but I could walk in the hall and but they underestimated how much I was going to walk as I've spent most of my days on my feet lol. So for the last few days of the hospital stay my doctor told me that I should rest more because nurses reported that I walk to freaking much and and chief of the ward would probably make me stay even longer if it would happen again. It was so so hard to cut down the walking and a couple of times my doctor had to remind me to sit on my ass lol.
I had to eat at least half a serving. I had vegetarian and high protein diet consisting of 5 meals a day. I had to lie in bed for at least 30 minutes after every meal and if I needed to pee after eating nurses had to go to the toilet with me lol. And I was being weighed in my underwear every other day.
I was eating the minimum amount of food and walked a lot to burn calories so my weight dropped even tho I was eating more than I did at home (probably because I wasn't counting calories), I've lost 2.6 lbs there (84.6 -> 82 lbs) but I feel so so much better - both physically and mentally.
I was released yesterday, I'm going to spend this weekend at home and I'm going to have a residential admission on monday.
Sorry guys for my english, I can't even talk/write in my mother tongue without making mistakes anymore lol. This ed shit is making me dumb as fuck
#37
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
- Accountability access
- 3001 posts
Omniscient
- LocationPoland
Posted 26 April 2021 - 06:33 PM
Height: 158 cm
Weight: 87.8 lbs -> 80.7 lbs
BMI: 15.9 -> 14.66
Measurements:
Waist: 55.5 cm or 21.85 in -> 53 cm or 20.9 in
Hips: 81 cm or 31.9 in -> 79.5 or 31.3 in
Bicep: 21 cm or 8.3 in -> 20 cm or 7.9 in
Bicep (relaxed): 19.5 cm or 7.7 in -> 18 cm or 7.1
Thighs: 42 cm or 16.53 in -> 40.5 cm -> 15.95 in
No comments:
Post a Comment