#21 
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Posted 15 March 2022 - 11:25 AM
solenoid, on 14 Mar 2022 - 4:18 PM, said:
ooo how nice!! so far i am liking it, quite a bit actually i didn't realize reading could be so enjoyable loll.
and yeah, i figure it's really not worth the energy yk? the logical parts of my brain have just given up with the ed parts. good to hear you also try to do the same thing!! it's def a lot better 4 ur mental health.
and yay, are u talking ab the fluffernutter or the green legume soup? whichever u try i hope u enjoy!! <3 also if you're talking ab the fluffernutter these were the marshmallows i used, they're vegan(let's avoid animal (ab)use when we can!)
The fluffernutter recipe, I love fluffernutter! I try to eat as clean as I can. Unfortunately with my IBS, I have a hard time being vegan. But I'm dairy free. Still trying to figure out the diet with my health issues and world issues. I do so enjoy watching your vegan journey. I envy it, my body just hates me if I eat that much fruit and wheat/ grain. But I support you 100%!!!
#22
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Posted 15 March 2022 - 01:10 PM
water.sprite, on 15 Mar 2022 - 11:25 AM, said:
The fluffernutter recipe, I love fluffernutter! I try to eat as clean as I can. Unfortunately with my IBS, I have a hard time being vegan. But I'm dairy free. Still trying to figure out the diet with my health issues and world issues. I do so enjoy watching your vegan journey. I envy it, my body just hates me if I eat that much fruit and wheat/ grain. But I support you 100%!!!
oh, gotcha! i only learned of fluffernutters recently, were they a childhood treat for you? that's super cool. i think the marshmallows i linked are low FODMAP btw but definitely go with whatever your gut is comfortable with, obviously it's tough to be 100% plant-based with a chronic illness.
also i hope this isn't out of line, but i did some digging around and found this site — you might've seen it already, but it could possibly aid you in choosing more plant-based options that don't cause IBS flare ups? wish you luck on your journey of finding your diet too!! hopefully as time goes on kinder and affordable alternatives come to the market for you to have more options despite your illness
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#23
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Posted 15 March 2022 - 01:34 PM
solenoid, on 15 Mar 2022 - 1:10 PM, said:
oh, gotcha! i only learned of fluffernutters recently, were they a childhood treat for you? that's super cool. i think the marshmallows i linked are low FODMAP btw but definitely go with whatever your gut is comfortable with, obviously it's tough to be 100% plant-based with a chronic illness.
also i hope this isn't out of line, but i did some digging around and found this site — you might've seen it already, but it could possibly aid you in choosing more plant-based options that don't cause IBS flare ups? wish you luck on your journey of finding your diet too!! hopefully as time goes on kinder and affordable alternatives come to the market for you to have more options despite your illness
You're the sweetest! I'll definitely take a look! And no worries it's not out of line, I know for some people it is a sensitive subject, it's not for me as long as there is mutual respect and understanding which there is from you. I see it as helpful and informative not out of line! I'm sure I can have the fluffernutter with no problem (especially if i only have one or two), it's more of going straight vegan with all the fruit, grain and veggies but I do try to eat a lot of plant based by default because a lot of things have dairy, so it's always save to grab plant based things when I go out.
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Posted 15 March 2022 - 05:44 PM
tue mar 15. 2022
2 more school days before spring break yay!
intake
sesame ezekiel bread (160) marmite (4) split grams (26) tahini (56)
ambrosia apple (96)
orange (80) dates (113)
digestive (72) carob squares (49) vegan marshmallow (50)
then put together after toasting on the stove top-
yum!! wayyy better than when i microwaved the marshmallows, the texture was perf!! only thing was the carob pieces were sad and cold and only semi melted lol but still it was fun to make & eat!!
collard greens (32) bell pepper onion blend (27) split grams again (127)
lol this does not look appetizing but idk i like it so what
also i did the thing where i blended the bell pepper along with the collard today for a more consistent texture. think i'd add more water next time though, today it came out vv thick
& added some curry powder (10) a bit later just to spice things up
collard stalks (5)
ugh i love snacking on these, this is what celery wishes it could be
green beans (63) ketchup (had another spoon not pictured — 10)
+ unpictured vitamins (2)
total: 982
also last week i got these green split peas from the grocers and i'm so excited to have them tomorrow!
i didn't even know green split peas were a thing tbh, i'd only ever seen the yellow kind. apparently these are legit just green peas like the vegetable but processed/harvested differently which is why they're a legume here. so odd, kind of like how corn is a vegetable but also a whole grain *–*
anyways i think they're done cooking, they're inside the rice cooker rn i have to go check on them soon lol
notes
- planning to weigh myself tomorrow. it's definitely going to be above 92 lbs but as long as i'm below that by the end of the month (preferably <90), it's fine by me. i still have 16 days for a solid deficit and whatnot so yeah.
- math & science tests tomorrow at school, i haven't gotten anything less than an A so far in both those classes so i really want to maintain that streak even though i know i can 'afford' a bad grade in my log. yet i hardly studied after coming home, only started 2 hours after around 6:30 pm rip. probably will go to the library tomorrow morning before school to meet with the math tutors and be prepared for my test. yuuuckkkk
- english teacher wasn't in school again i think she has covid or sth
- planning a higher intake day tmr like around 1450 cals or so. might change depending how my weigh in goes but yeah.
#25
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Posted 16 March 2022 - 07:23 PM
wed mar 16. 2022
i CaN't wAiT tO eAt mY gReEn SpLiT pEaS tOmOrRow *proceeds to instead have a digestive cookie feast*
intake
orange (75) vegetable pastry (152)
digestives (143) tahini (38) vegan marshmallow (50)
yasss burnt qween go girl give us nothing
jk it was pretty good but rn looking at pictures of those godforsaken biscuits is making me sick lol
speak of the devil-
digestives (plus a fuck ton more not pictured!! — 1145)
apples (74) orange again (40)
pine nuts (225)
had some not pictured yeast flatbread (224) as well
total: 2166
clown shit!
but you know what isn't clown shit? this totally quirky pic i took this morning when heading to school...to do clown shit ironically. last minute studying like the girlboss i am
notes
- i didn't weigh in this morning
honestly probably won't until break is over at this point. i know i just keep delaying when i weigh in but i'm really afraid to step on the scale and have it be higher than 92 ugh.
- did meet with tutors today. neglected a shower for it eek hope nobody noticed that i smelled bad or kind of crusty.
asked my mom to call me out of home room to stay an extra period at the library but apparently you aren't supposed to do that. like the tutors are technically not supposed to help you if they know you're being called out of class for help :/ felt really ashamed for my actions when i heard that, so i won't be pulling this shenanigan again.
also my science tests got moved to tomorrow. i didn't study. honestly just ready to take the L unless i decide to do something about it early when i wake up idk.
science is my favorite subject man. i'm literally going to be studying a concentration for the physical sciences in college, at least that's what i'm on track for. idk what's wrong with me and why i can't study, maybe i'm just burnt out. ugh, this is not what the feminists were fighting for when they wanted equal education and opportunity, they would be so disappointed seeing how i'm slacking.
- english teacher not present in class again. apparently she's at school just not coming to class? wonder why that is.
- planning to fast or have a <300 cal day. my stomach honestly needs a break and i feel disgusting and huge
knowing me i obviously won't stick to my word but still. just putting it here to be aCcOuNtAbLe or whatever
#26
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Posted 17 March 2022 - 05:40 AM
that picture is so pretty! reminds me of my tumblr ~aesthetic~ era haha.
please don't be too hard on yourself <3 it's normal to have higher calorie days.
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Posted 17 March 2022 - 11:55 AM
solenoid, on 16 Mar 2022 - 7:23 PM, said:
yasss burnt qween go girl give us nothing
This fucking SENT ME omg I laughed for a solid 5 minutes hahah! Also your vegan marshmallows actually inspired me to order some vegan marshmallow fluff, so thank you for the food inspo~
Sorry to hear about the intake tho :c . I used to binge on digestive cookies back in 2021 as well omg. I used to put cream cheese on them (I was eating lactose free dairy at the point which I no longer do lol) and let's just say the calories stacked up faaaaast. Digestive cookies are now banned from my household hahah...
Also that car picture is so aesthetic omg <3. I love the colors and the nostalgic feel to it!
✦✦✦✦✦✦
✦ Human trash & art hoe ✦
✦ Height: 5'2 / 158 cm ✦
✦ Accountability ✦
✦ INFJ ✦
✦ Sun virgo ✦ Moon capricorn ✦ Ascendant Leo ✦
✦ CW: 112.6 lbs / 51.1 kg / BMI 20.5 ✦
✦ HW: 130 lbs / 59 kg / BMI 23.6 ✦
✦ LW: 97 lbs / 44.2 kg / BMI 17.7 ✦
GW: As low as possible
✦✦✦✦✦✦
#28
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Posted 17 March 2022 - 05:49 PM
rainy.days, on 17 Mar 2022 - 05:40 AM, said:
that picture is so pretty! reminds me of my tumblr ~aesthetic~ era haha.
please don't be too hard on yourself <3 it's normal to have higher calorie days.
thank you haha!! and ooh omg tbh i've always loved those early 2k tumblr aesthetic photos they really tickle my brain in the right spots
& aww <33 appreciate u saying that!
_Jem_, on 17 Mar 2022 - 11:55 AM, said:
This fucking SENT ME omg I laughed for a solid 5 minutes hahah! Also your vegan marshmallows actually inspired me to order some vegan marshmallow fluff, so thank you for the food inspo~
Sorry to hear about the intake tho :c . I used to binge on digestive cookies back in 2021 as well omg. I used to put cream cheese on them (I was eating lactose free dairy at the point which I no longer do lol) and let's just say the calories stacked up faaaaast. Digestive cookies are now banned from my household hahah...
Also that car picture is so aesthetic omg <3. I love the colors and the nostalgic feel to it!
LOL i'm glad i could make you laugh, that makes me so happy!! and yesss i saw on ur thread you'd acquired some of that spread i hope u like it!! it was such a nice treat to have these marshmallows. hope i can continue being food inspo too 
& yeah, it was bound to happen i guess with how freaking stressed i was. but yes arent digestive cookies so easy to binge on?? i guess it's because of how calorically dense i was. and hm i want to try making some tofu cream cheese to have w digestives now lol, a treat w/o harming our nonhuman friends
but before that i have to get my appetite for them back haha!! still can't even look at them after eating so many yesterday
thank you btw!! i wish the camera captured how massive the sun looked in the sky too but i still think it was a nice pic regardless
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Posted 17 March 2022 - 08:52 PM
thu mar 17. 2022
happy shamrock day! (and start of spring break for me 
)
intake
grapes (14) orange (40) apple (47)
chili rice rings (319)
sesame ezekiel bread (80) tahini (112) strawberry jam (50)
i mixed the jam and tahini together before spreading it on the toast!! it was very good this way, i liked it a lot.
i think i'm going to have this again for breakfast tomorrow
apple (106) sweet corn (90)
i heated this in the microwave and man microwaves are literally so weird in the middle of the bowl the corn bits were still frozen but on the edges when i ate from there it was so hot i think i burned the inside of my mouth
collard greens (26) green split peas! (128) curry powder (10)
had to have something green for St. Patricks day of course, especially because i didn't even wear anything green to school today smh smh
altho tbh...i really really wish i hadn't added the curry powder to this. i don't do well with seasonings, they're very overwhelming for me sometimes even salt is just idk like sensory overload for me. but today was especially bad bc for some reason the curry powder made this green soup taste very similar to this one marine flesh ""dish"" that my mom made for me as a kid and it made me feel very disgusting to eat it knowing what i know now.
i did finish it because i wasn't going to waste my beloved collard greens like that, but lesson learned — definitely not touching that curry powder ever ugh :/ first world problems lmao sEaSoNiNgS sCaRe Me
+ yeast flatbread (224) not pictured
total: 1246
notes
- i think i have a crush on my math teacher lmao this is sooo embarrassing he's like twice my age what's wrong with me. he took off his mask today for a bit (mask mandate is not a thing at my school anymore dw) to show everyone what he looked like and eeeeeeee *–* hngfjfekjwsj
although he said something kinda :// later like we were talking about vaccines/masking and just covid in general and he said he didn't understand the people who didn't want masks or vaccines either and said they were "asking for covid" idk. i don't think anyone is asking for covid, i really do believe anti vaxxers are just severely misinformed. i feel bad for them tbh. it's so sad to hear stories about how they get covid and suffer in the hospitals and have their regrets for not taking the vaccine. and it is their choice, nobody can do anything your body without your permission.
idk maybe i need to be more critical. i am vaxxed in case anyone was wondering, i got my first shot i think last jan, and my 2nd dose a month or so later? then got my booster i think over winter break lol i don't remember.
personally didn't have any side effects any of the times. my only regrets is wishing the vaccines weren't testing on innocent non-consenting animals of course, but i still took it anyways since i figured medicine is not worth risking it...obviously if there was a vegan vaccine i would've gotten it in a heartbeat
- still not sure when i plan to weigh in lmao
- i stopped by the library and asked one of the science tutors for some help with practice problems during lunch before my science test today. i'm glad we went over my questions!! and i think the test was pretty straightforward which was nice. i hope i did well on it
and hahah funny coincidence but we keep talking of solenoids in class and all i can think of is mpa!!
- english teacher wasn't at school again but i didn't mind bc it meant i could study for my science test i was talking about
i am still kinda worried/annoyed for her though...wish she'd let us know what's going on but then again obviously she doesn't have to share that info unless she wanted to.
- haha i didn't stick to my <300 cal plan i said yesterday, not surprising. but i'm not mad about today's intake either.
- arghhhh btw one of the tutors in the library i especially liked bc i thought she was vegan is actually not vegan i realized bc she was talking about how she wanted to fish :/ why can't people just leave fish alone? if fish had vocal chords, imagine how horrific fishing would be. especially "catch and release" fishing which is supposed to be """""ethical""""" — how is permanently maiming somebody ethical!?!?! how is eating their flesh when you have other foods to eat ethical!?!?! ugh. disappointed but not surprised. i hope i can make lots of vegan friends in college at least
- i wore shorts to school today over a pair of tights bc the weather is getting warmer (and i didn't have clean pants hahah)
- lol after my science test i accidently left my tablet charging in the classroom and got all the way to my next class before realizing. so i had to sprint back so much to get it and then come back again lol it was a lot of clownery but i didn't feel that out of shape which was a pleasant surprise
- omg i finished reading A Thousand Splendid Suns btw!! 4.75/5 stars. it was lowkey a lot of traumaporn but still. i enjoyed it as it made me feel sooo many emotions. stayed up till 2 am reading it though lmao.
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Posted 18 March 2022 - 07:39 PM
fri mar 18. 2022
day 1/10 of spring break!
didn't do much, mostly just read a new book i started, A Man Called Ove and watched the 1961 film Une femme est une femme — it's lovely to have time immersing myself with humanities like this!
intake
grapes (24) oranges (40) apples (34) pear (51)
i've always thought i preferred apples over pears due to their crispiness, but this pear was just ever so slightly unripe and had some bite to it and honestly? it tasted nicer than the apple. pleasant surprise!
sesame ezekiel bread (80) tahini (56) strawberry jam (50)
i couldn't find my safe green plate lol so i literally ate off the lid of a glass container...which is apparently safer than a proper plate. because that obviously makes sense 
grapes (62) walnuts (118) pears (43) dates (113)
collard greens (26) green split peas (128) sweet corn (80)
no overwhelming seasoning today <3 so refreshing & lovely. snacked on the collard stems i didn't blend up afterwards too!
baby lima beans (100)
had these mashed with a bit of marmite (3) too.
i accidentally burned them while warming them up yikes. but fortunately i was able to save them and they didn't taste burnt which was good.
+ yeast flatbread (224) not pictured
total: 1232
notes
#31
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Posted 19 March 2022 - 05:32 PM
E joy some fun reading on your break! I love the healthy parents figures ❤️ I cried when I read a thousand splendid sun's. Did you end up liking it?
#32
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Posted 19 March 2022 - 06:41 PM
water.sprite, on 19 Mar 2022 - 5:32 PM, said:
Gosh, you make me want to get Ezekiel bread again! I love your food pictures.
E joy some fun reading on your break! I love the healthy parents figures ❤ I cried when I read a thousand splendid sun's. Did you end up liking it?
yes i love sprouted bread it's so nice. just curious, is sprouted bread easier for you to digest while managing your IBS?
& aw thanks^2! and i do too. btw yes i did enjoy thousand splendid suns, i'd give it a 4.75/5 stars! at times it felt like it was "over the top" but then i remembered this is the reality for a lot of human beings unfortunately. super heartbreaking story, that's for sure.
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Posted 19 March 2022 - 07:58 PM
sat mar 19. 2022
intake
carob squares (97)
sesame ezekiel bread (80) garlic (9) peanut butter (30) olive oil (20)
& after i panfried/"grilled" the pb&garlic lol
orange lollipop (26)
actual orange (78)
+ late-night binge not pictured (approx. 3200)
total: 3540
notes
- fully binged last night after posting - now i've decided to allot myself 4950 cal for the rest of this month so we'll see how that goes. hopefully i stick to it bc then my average intake per day in March will be just about 1000
- i fainted (?) today. thankfully nobody saw when i sat down in the middle of the doorway to gather my senses again. as i was laying in bed afterward i had this sound in my ears as if someone was shaking one of those rain makers near my head...very small rain makers. it went away a while after though.
I had been talking to my mom about veganism when that happened. I guess I made an insensitive comment; honestly I don't think it was insensitive I think it was just out of place and not appropriate given the contexr because I didn't provide any context but it was also kind of obnoxious on my mom's part because she just feels like if she ignores everything awful happening in the world that it'll stop happening like obviously it won't
anyways after she reprimanded me for that I was standing there feeling ashamed, she went to use the bathroom or whatever & yeah as I was walking back to my room i was like oh my God I need to sit down cuz i'm about to pass out...think i did a weird twirl on the way down too
- i tried one of the foods on my foods list today! it was the grilled pb & garlic which tasted quite pleasant ngl. would've added a bit more pb though that is all.
- house has been loud today. too many people. i love the silence, i can't wait to have my own place. i have to keep living for that at least.
- 4610 cals left for the remainder of march.
- new rule is i can't eat the same food two days in a row bc i really don't want to be doing the thing where i just eat the same shit every day that's so depressing.
- studied a bit for my proficiency exams for college. idek when i'm supposed to take them, the university website is very unhelpful but whatever. i might not even take them but i don't want to waste family money, doing well on those exams means i get credit for the classes i've already taken at high school. but idk.
- ugh i'm pissed.
- was gonna have green soup for dinner but my mom made the kitchen smell gross by cooking the bodily fluids of an abused and exploited cow so. appetite was kinda gone just had the orange instead :/
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Posted 20 March 2022 - 07:10 AM
solenoid, on 19 Mar 2022 - 6:41 PM, said:
yes i love sprouted bread it's so nice. just curious, is sprouted bread easier for you to digest while managing your IBS?
& aw thanks^2! and i do too. btw yes i did enjoy thousand splendid suns, i'd give it a 4.75/5 stars! at times it felt like it was "over the top" but then i remembered this is the reality for a lot of human beings unfortunately. super heartbreaking story, that's for sure.
I haven't had it in several years. But I did like it. Cooked veggies are easier for me. I can't eat kale and other raw dark leafy greens. So if it's cooked, I'm wondering if I could try it again.
And yes, unfortunately, our world has worse people than that. I'm glad you liked it. I'm excited to see how Ove goes!
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Posted 20 March 2022 - 05:35 PM
sun mar 20. 2022
intake
pear (103)
rosette cookie (90) cherry lollipop (26)
collard greens (26) green split peas (128)
strawberry peach flavor mix (2)
each pack is 5 cals, but it listed it as having 2g of carb which means it should be 8 cals?
anyways i only used a little which is why i'm counting it as 2
+ vitamins not pictured (2)
total: 377
notes
- took a long shower this morning and seriously scrubbed tf out of EVERYTHING. it was nice to take some time to do that. sad knowing that i probably wouldn't have though if it weren't for having errands a bit later in the day w an acquaintance of mine (omg it just took me so long to spell acquaintance correctly haha brain fog amirite)
- went on a walk which was nice. it was 50F but the sun was out so it felt warmer. i wore shorts and even shaved my legs before going out, depression who?
- spent most of the day in bed reading. still not done with A Man Called Ove but getting close. will likely finish tonight before going to bed or so i hope.
- low restricting is going well. i know it isn't sustainable but this is the plan for the rest of this month, then i'll worry about upping my intake.
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Posted 22 March 2022 - 06:15 PM
tue mar 22. 2022
intake
strawberry peach flavor mix (3)
pear (57) orange (16)
mixed vegetables (113)
salted green split peas (128)
walnuts (132)
oats (153) pear (103)
ahh i forget how good oats cooked on the burner are. yum yum. also i ate the skin of the pears separately while cutting it into chunks
+ collard greens (17) & tahini fudge (160) not pictured
total: 881
notes
- i didn't post yesterday because i had a really bad binge. i was in so much pain afterward, couldn't even bring myself to drink water because i thought my stomach lining would genuinely rupture. it's weird because i swear it wasn't even that much food? approx 4150 cals, i've had far bigger binges than that so idek what happened. my back was k i l l i n g me and oh god. yeah it was not a good time.
- aside from that, i didn't do much yesterday. read Artemis by Andy Weir which was disappointing. i'd read The Martian at the start of high school and i remember liking it so much that i even watched the movie afterward...however this novel was just not the vibe. Weir seriously needs to work on writing and telling stories from a female perspective
- weighed in yesterday morning too — 92.4 lbs which is .2 up from when i last checked on the 4th. so i've essentially maintained since then. hoping to get under 92 asap so i can change my cw to say 91 lol. i just truncate the decimal when measuring progress idk seems kinda like sth a normie would do buuut idrc
- also tried making carob hot chocolate yesterday which was an epic fail and triggered my binge. pathetic.
- wanted to make some pancakes tonight for dinner but i needed oat flour except i couldn't make that since the blender was dirty. so rip. that's also why i had my split peas alone, didn't have a clean blender to liquefy my collard greens.
- my mom made banana bread/banana cake so i'll have to have at least 1 slice over the next few days :/ she used non-organic (bone char) sugar which sucks but i'm just gonna let myself be lenient with it since a carnist made the cake and they won't really gaf about bone char since they don't care abt where their animal abuse products come from in the first place. no shade to my mom love her just...wish she would be more responsible with her consumer habits as i do every non-vegan.
the whole cake recipe i think is roughly 4000 cals, so i might try to have between 150-250 cals worth of it. feel like that would be an appropriate normie amt
- woke up at freaking noon today btw. i was up all night reading. i usually don't read a whole lot, just books for school but i'm glad i've sorta picked up this habit over break time. i doubt it'll stick once school starts again next monday but i'll enjoy it in the mean time.
- my mom kept saying that i was using her cocoa powder today while she was making the batter for her cake and it was frankly very triggering bc chocolate is a huuuge fear food of mine. so that pissed me off (carob =/= chocolate btw) but whatever
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Posted 23 March 2022 - 06:26 AM
following!!! you are my fav person on here asf
click my eggs/dragons pls > 
< click my eggs/dragons pls
they/she
an-r & arfid dx, dk what i am now
!!! ethical vegan !!!
insta: @llafleurartt
stats in the spoiler <3
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Posted 23 March 2022 - 08:10 AM
thenarcissus, on 23 Mar 2022 - 06:26 AM, said:
following!!! you are my fav person on here asf
omg i'm so honored!! (/▽＼*)｡o○♡
same goes to you too my friend!! i love meeting other vegans, helps me restore my faith in humanity lullz
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Posted 23 March 2022 - 03:37 PM
wed mar 23. 2022
intake
gooey banana cake (+ many many many more pieces not pictured — 1105)
my mom baked this yesterday and i wanted to spread out my share over the next few days but i ended up eating it all at once lol it really be like that some times
tahini fudge (115) date water (2)
close up of fudge -
i made this using 3 dates, 3/4 tsp coconut flour, & 1 tbsp tahini. i might use less tahini and more dates if i make this another time.
the ingredients make five little fudge balls, but i only had 3 today
orange (33) blueberries (21) apple (31)
mixed vegetables (50) green & yellow split peas (120) potato (35)
potato again (35) red grapes (38)
then, unsurprisingly, i binged(?)!
didn't even track my binge this time either...so no clue how many calories i stuffed into my pie hole
total: 1585+?
notes
- i cleaned up my depression dining table today!! it was gross and crusty for so long but this morning i just starting washing all the stale plates and bowls that were sitting out and before you knew it, i wiped down the surface and no lingering dirty dinnerware remained. small wins :') i hate that i've become so dysfunctional that a simple task like this requires a pat on the back but...positive reinforcement i guess
- now reading The Song of Achilles. so far i am liking it a lot, reminds me of percy jackson but a little bit more sophisticated
- logged into my college's website yesterday to set up my university ID. ahh i still have so much logistical stuff to do but one step at a time. i think the next thing i need to figure out is housing which is v scary ah to think that another person is going to be in my personal space hgnnh i feel like a roommate can make or break your college experience man. i hope they're extroverted and adopt me or sth cuz otherwise i literally will make zero friends i am such a recluse irl
- idk why i'm bingeing so much. ugh. fml fml.
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#40
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- 1235 posts
Sage
- Locationthe states
Posted 24 March 2022 - 07:52 PM
thu mar 24. 2022
days binge free: 1
lol i didn't feel like taking nice photos today. oops?
intake
strawberry-peach flavor mix, 5.5 strawberries, 12 slices apples/asian pear
green grams + yellow/green split peas, mixed vegetables
"sOup"
expired pickle
the best by date was april 22 2019 but i feel like pickles don't expire so i'm taking that with a grain of salt. i did rise the juice off the pickle just in case though #foodsafety
i also found a bottle of fat free balsamic vinaigrette that expired august 12 2016 which is scary ummm i had like not even started 7th grade then wtf. but i think vinaigrette isn't supposed to expire either so lol yolo but i'll have it tomorrow i don't want to eat more than one (1) expired food a day
tbh though rummaging through the back of the fridge gave me a lot of anxiety i need to be very careful making sure i eat stuff before things go bad when i move out food that's gone bad just gives me massive anxiety lol. i was so anxious after clearing out a bunch of moldy shit that i even put the active dry yeast crap in the freezer just in case :')
ANYWAYS
5 orange sections, 4 strawberries, emblics (only had 1), 2 slices apple
man eating the orange after that expired pickle was a whole tongue orgasm highly recommend
on the other hand, the emblic tasted so bad I literally had to choke the one I had down...its only redeemable quality was that it made water (and like, my spit in my mouth) taste like nectar afterwards for a bit
maple tahini mylk, sweetcorn oatmeal, green grams
+ 1 pc tahini fudge not pictured
total: 1018
notes
- got tapatalk this morning bc i heard it would make uploading photos easier...uh yeah. it definitely does not do that haha.
- i am terrible at taking care of myself. i kept telling myself all day to just brush my teeth already and i still haven't. i hope i can get myself to do it before going to bed at least. god when did the simplest of tasks become so fucking difficult i swear. i hope it gets better once i move out and have a place of my own... then again, it's probably gonna be a hot while until that actually happens bc of the housing crisis and all that crap
scary to think i'm gonna have to support myself soon i feel like i havent mentally developed since my eating disorder habits started, idk how i'm supposed to manage all that as an adult
- started my period today which is why i made the date text color red. day 1 of period. hopefully it ends before monday & school
at least this explains why i've been bingeing so much and just generally being gross and disgusting. man why do periods exist
- have to make sure to wash clothes asap so i have things to wear for the school week. a whole 5 day week after break is going to feel brutal and preparing my clothes ahead of time will definitely calm things down for future me.
- mostly just read and sat on my tablet/phone today. just one of those days. at least i didn't binge though, i'm happy about that
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