Ruby’s Restriction(5’1”), 90 days until Bday
Started by n0thingleft0fme, Dec 27 2021 09:19 AM
241 replies to this topic
#241 
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Posted 03 May 2022 - 03:59 PM
Broke my fast after 40 hours. Ate some sweet and salty popcorn and a microwave korean beef bowl. I was sooooo hungry after unpacking stock, i felt like I had to refuel. Also the monster zero i drank gave me sugar cravings, damn artificial sweeteners. So yeah i ate. It sucks. Im fat. But whatever. Idk if this means I get to eat dinner? Or should I just go back to fasting lol. No clue. I’ll see how I feel after work.
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#242
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Posted Yesterday, 10:23 AM
Yesterday was good. I didn’t eat anything until 8pm when i had 3 cans of alcohol, a few handfuls of chips, and 2 small vegan mochi treat things. So i didnt eat healthy but at least i didn’t eat a lot.
I visited with my trans friend. She has lost a lot of weight due to gender dysphoria and confided in me that she sometimes throws up if she eats full meals because she can’t handle that much food. She also told me she survives on coffee, cigarettes, and peanut butter. Triggering as fuck. Meanwhile im 20 pounds heavier than when she saw me last, so mortifying. At least i got to smoke a ciggy!
In the evening i visited my best friend for a fire. Thats when i drank the alcohol and had snacks. I feel super conflicted. I won’t lie, i have a crush on my friend and know she likes me back. But im in a relationship going on 3 years. And she has just started dating a guy in a town nearby. Im jealous but i have no right to be. I’ll keep being a supportive friend, just like i’m gonna keep pretending to be straight and happy with my current relationship. No wonder i binge eat, im trying to cover up so much shame…
ANYWAYS today I weigh 114 which is bmi 21.5.
I visited with my trans friend. She has lost a lot of weight due to gender dysphoria and confided in me that she sometimes throws up if she eats full meals because she can’t handle that much food. She also told me she survives on coffee, cigarettes, and peanut butter. Triggering as fuck. Meanwhile im 20 pounds heavier than when she saw me last, so mortifying. At least i got to smoke a ciggy!
In the evening i visited my best friend for a fire. Thats when i drank the alcohol and had snacks. I feel super conflicted. I won’t lie, i have a crush on my friend and know she likes me back. But im in a relationship going on 3 years. And she has just started dating a guy in a town nearby. Im jealous but i have no right to be. I’ll keep being a supportive friend, just like i’m gonna keep pretending to be straight and happy with my current relationship. No wonder i binge eat, im trying to cover up so much shame…
ANYWAYS today I weigh 114 which is bmi 21.5.
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